Don't Stop Believin'

Photo by Alain Levitt.

Dude, check it: Journey are back. How back are they? Basically 100% back. Steve Perry has been replaced by Steve Perry impersonator Steve Augeri and the band has been blowing away audiences from coast to coast for the past four years. Some have argued that this new version is better than the old one. If someone wanted to argue that with me I’d be like, “Fuck yeah, dude, I’m on your side.” They party way harder than they did in the old days. That’s one thing for sure right there. You should hear them now. They are fucking balls-to-the-wall rock n’ roll on stage, off stage, on CD, in your Walkman, in your fucking brain. Mötley Crüe and Van Halen look like a bunch of castrated babies compared to these guys. Check out my interview with Augeri. It’s like ROCK AND ROLL IS HERE TO STAY.

VICE: Dude, you fucking rock. From handyman in a Journey cover band to Steve Motherfucking Perry No. 2. Dude!

Steve Augeri:

I sometimes miss the old days. I still get excited when someone asks me to fix a leaky faucet or do some sheetrock. I like to get back to that stuff.

Fuck, yeah. You must be getting mad pussy on this tour!

Every now and then I’ll be singing and some woman will throw some undergarment onto the stage. And of course I’ll just stand there blushing while I sing.

Hot! It must be like a fucking orgy up in that mother.

I’m very much in love with my wife and it shows. I can really bring the house down with “Faithfully” (a song about how devoted he is to his wife while on tour). That really gets the lighters going, which is nice, but then you have to start worrying about the butane and hair catching on fire.

Cool beans. What about coke? You guys must be like fucking industrial vacuum cleaners this time around. Journey are just made for coke.

I love Apple Jacks. I’ve loved them since I was a kid. I just love them, what can I say? But I don’t go near them when I’m on the road. I also loved shaved ices. My wife always tells me to get more of the chocolate-flavored ones. I always tell her it’s the lemon ices that go the quickestxI say, “Get more lemon!” I like spaghetti, too.

What about your ride? When I hear you do “Don’t Stop Believin’” I imagine you guys cruising through Brooklyn in a Ferrari convertible with like 1,000 chicks partying all over the place.

I used to have a minivan, but I kind of moved up. Don’t get me wrong, minivans have been great for me, but now that I’ve had some success with my career, I had to get a nice black luxury sedan. I’ve got a Toyota Avalon now with leather interior. My family loves it.

Dude, what the fuck are you talking about?

What?