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The Animals Issue


Fantasy games depress me.
Κείμενο Syrup Davies

God of War

Genre: 3D Action Adventure

Platform: PS2

Developer: Sony Computer Entertainment

Published by: Sony Computer Entertainment

We recently hired a pretty much perfect guy for our New Zealand edition. Good-looking, highly motivated, funny, and smart. He is also a massive geek who discusses computer games at length via email. Here’s an excerpt from one of his “debates” about the new PlayStation 2 game God of War.


Chris: It should really be called God of Whip Ass cuz he hands out some serious beat-downs. God of War kind of implies that he sits back and seriously thinks about how he distributes his whip-ass and then sends his whip-ass troops in to whip some ass.

Gerald: I think he is doing just fine. Granted, he is a crazed albino whose sole purpose is to obliterate everything he encounters, but who isn’t these days? What would worry me more is if he repressed that anger. You may be shocked to discover that a whopping one in five Americans has an anger-management problem. That’s almost 20 percent. Finished the game today, by the way.

Chris: Do you feel empty? Finishing the second best PS2 game EVER must be kind of like, “What do I do with myself now?”

Gerald: I AM feeling a tad despondent. It should be stressed that the graphic violence in here is indeed extremely graphic, but I think it’s only because the graphics are so good. Some game reviewers would probably claim it contains the most graphickest graphic-violence graphix EVER. Not me though. That’s a ridiculous claim. I just became aware that God of War is rated R16 in NZ. Good call, it’s definitely not suitable for those overly impressionable 15-year-olds—so much slow-motion cutting and bleeding. God, I like this game.