FYI.

This story is over 5 years old.

Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - Do You Believe in Ghosts?

I think it’d be really cool if there were some Caspers around, some nice ghosts that I could just hang out, watch the game, or listen to music with. That would be great. They could keep me company but they wouldn't eat all my food or dirty up my place.
RH
Κείμενο Ron Hemphill

Hey Ron,

I'm going to pose a question to you, but first I want you to know why I'm asking you. Aside from the advice column you run, you seem like a pretty standard guy. I’m not trying to demean your character with that statement or take a stab at your general outlook on life, but from one guy to another, I'm just curious at to what you think of this: 

To me, it's a picture of the ghost of my recently deceased cousin. He died young and unexpectedly. I've shown this photo to many friends and they all write it off like it's a "shimmer of light" or anything other than an actual ghost. People try and dispute paranormal happenings all the time. But I think it is easier to accept these kinds of otherworldly things as being real than it is to be skeptic. I think it is really a ghost.

ΔΙΑΦΗΜΙΣΗ

As a man who gets asked a lot of stuff, I pose this question to you: Do you believe in ghosts?

Much love,
Catheter the Uncomfortable Ghost

Hey Catheter,

I think people believe in ghosts because it makes them feel like they have a place to go when they die. No one wants to think after living for years that it all ends with you just rotting in the dirt. Everyone wants to believe there is something better than this, or that their existence will always have some purpose. I’m the same way.

So, do I believe in ghosts? Yeah. Have I ever seen a ghost? Definitely not. Do I think what you saw was a ghost? Sure. As long as you weren't on any magic mushrooms when you took that picture. But I take your word for it. However, you really should be careful who you share this story with. If you brought up your cousin’s ghost in a job interview, I would never hire you. And I would remind you that VICE does drug testing (even though we don't).

I like the idea that there are dead people walking around impacting your life and taking over your body. This stuff is great for TV, but I could also see it being true. However, I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about dead people, personally. So even if there were a bunch of ghosts around me, I probably wouldn’t really notice them. I also think things could be haunted. But unlike most people, I don't think living in a haunted house would be that bad. I think that it’d be really cool if there were some Caspers around, some nice ghosts that I could just hang out, watch the game, or listen to music with. That would be great. They could keep me company but they wouldn't eat up all my food or dirty up my place. Maybe a ghost is the kind of friend I've been looking for?

I'm not totally new to the paranormal. I’ve dabbled in some of this spooky ghost stuff before. For example, I played the Oujia board when I was a kid. I was looking for the ghost of Jimmy Hoffa. But I wasn’t trying to find out who killed him. I wanted to ask him where I could find all of his hidden money. That’s what I do every time I play with the Oujia board, I just try to talk to rich dead white folks. I don’t know if you can really trust that thing though. Maybe your hand is moving it subconsciously? Who knows? Spin the bottle was a better game anyway, back in the day. One thing I never tried as a kid is a séance, but I wish I had. Those look pretty cool. But it’s a little more extreme than the Oujia board. Beyond the séance, the practice of voodoo is even more out there. I would never say that voodoo isn’t real though, because I don’t want one of you voodoo guys out there to make a doll out of me. Maybe I’ll make a voodoo doll of some of my superiors at work and start messing with them so I can magically get them to give me that big raise. I know just the right buttons to push.

Ron is VICE's accounts receivable manager. He also happens to be a master of mixed martial arts and a treasure trove of knowledge and advice. Even your sick perversions, dysfunctional predicaments, and anti-social thoughts don't surprise him. So go ahead, ask him something already. Email Ron your questions to HeyRon@vice.com or tweet them to @Hey_Ron. Every person who gets their question answered will receive their very own Hey Ron! t-shirt, three print issues of VICE magazine, and a personal note from Ron.

Previously - What's the Fourth of July About?