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Slap Some Sheep Placenta On Your Face And Let’s Party!

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Totally inconsequential stuff that got us off in fashion-land this week include Karl Lagerfeld looking hot! in a leotard nearly 40 years ago

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pondering serial killer jewelry, bottled hi-tech facials full of sheep’s placenta, and a handbag styled to look like a decapitated head.

SHEEP PLACENTA FACIAL

If you are one those people who’s willing to rub pretty much anything all over their face to look better, then maybe you ought to consider incorporating a little bit of sheep placenta into your daily skincare regimen. EMK, NeuCell, and hugely popular Australian brand Rebirth, are all among those now offering face cream made from protein extracted directly from the placentas of newborn lambs, which is great news, because bird poop facials and snake venom face masks just don’t seem to be cutting it for me anymore. And you thought your bull semen hair conditioner would be the best thing that ever happened to you.

LAGERFELD IN A LEOTARD

You do know Karl Lagerfeld was a total man-babe in the 70s, right? In the forthcoming biography on the late fashion illustrator Antonio Lopez, there are numerous old photographs of Lopez hanging out with Karl back when he was a bodybuilder who wore patterned sweater-vests. Unfortunately, the book cannot confirm whether he was actually wearing color, because, through some sort of conspiracy, the relevant photos of said sweater-vests are in black and white. Whatever, at least we can still say we saw Karl Lagerfeld in a leotard.

DECAPIFASHION

I was led to believe that the internet could answer any one of my questions, no matter how obscure the answer might be. However, I came across these amazing, anatomic bags on photographer Maisie Cousins’ blog, and can’t find any information about why they were conceived, which magazine decided to shoot them, or where the hell I can buy one. YOU LIED TO ME, MEDIA. It’s always been a dream of mine to carry my phone, keys, and assorted knick-knacks around in the severed head of a diner waitress from a low-budget porno, and, in one fell swoop, the internet both gaveth and taketh away, just like that. I’m honestly crushed.

SHALLOW CLOTHING

I guess the fact that there are already these parody sweatshirts out from Spanish brand Shallow Clothing proves that whole wingdings/tumblr aesthetic thing got old already. Damn, internet memes fade fast, which kinda sucks as we were actually into some of the better thought-out stuff. At least I hope they’re a parody, because this would be the laziest coattail-grabbing I’ve ever seen, if not. 

SICK JEWELRY

I’m not sure why people spend so much time obsessing over serial killers, I mean, are all these people killers in training? Or are they learning how to avoid being killed? I know I’ve never let a stranger tie me up ever since seeing Al Pacino in Cruising. Maybe they’re just trying to find people less depraved than them, or, worst of all, so bored and so lacking in imagination that channeling the horrible mixture of ordinariness and extraordinariness that these guys live out is the only way serial-killer fans can get off? Either way, Creepy Creations are the brains behind these custom serial-killer portrait rings. All you have to do is just send them over your criminal of choice and for $9.99 you get your very own killer jewelry. Sick.

Previously: Everybody Wants to be a Mermaid

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