pets

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  • Your Dog Is Full of Dirty Diseases

    Recent research has shown that sharing an ice cream cone with your dog or letting your cat nap on your face isn’t just unhygienic, it could kill you, shit-for-brains, so cut it out.

  • Syrian Hamsters

    These furry bags of joy love desert climates and stuffing as much food into their cheek pouches as possible—in fact, their Arabic name roughly translates as “Mr. Saddlebags.” Not joking.

  • Is There an Afterlife for Animals?

    When Lassie bit the big one, did she go to some Beggin' Strips-laden paradise where there's always a willing leg to hump and the toilet lid is never down, or did she just get all maggoty in the dirt behind the wooden tool shed?

  • Sorry Your Dog Got Decapitated

    If there’s a golden rule for people who run a dog-sitting business, it is this: Don’t let the dogs you’re watching get mauled by other dogs.

  • “Fathers and Snakes”

    Clancy Martin used to make a living as a jewelry salesman. Now he is a translator of Nietzsche and Kierkegaard and an associate professor of philosophy at the University of Missouri.

  • Vice Comics

    Ursula believes in the congeniality of souls. Which could be the pet she will choose?