The Jobs Issue
The World's Greatest Job
I thought jizz moppers didn't exist anymore. Isn't it illegal to beat off in public places now?
Pockets Dumb Fat
Listen, Columbo. You're mad because your money comes slow, and what you make in a year, I make at one show.
Girl Fights
I was waiting for my girlfriend to finish thrift shopping at Aardvark's in Venice Beach when I noticed a really attractive black girl sitting on the boardwalk with an ice pack on her head.
M.O.P.'s Mommy
M.O.P. are the music industry's biggest bullies, the gun-clapping Ted Nugents of hip-hop.
Loaded Basses
A lot of bands at the moment seem to share a similar formula. Sure, they mix in their own unique ingredients, but the recipe remains pretty much the same.
High Spy
I am a fucking narc and I work for a corporation that rents me and my fellow narcs out to your bosses for the sole purpose of getting you fired.
Ungrateful Dead
Yes, I'm a funeral director. That doesn't mean that I stand there in a jacket and skirt at someone's wake comforting the bereaved family. Nope.
Pretty In Pink
I dj and perform with DAMN, am a music consultant, produce, remix, and edit material for fashion wankers and corporate winkies alike and I co promote the Bang Gang with my good friends.
Fire A Friend
After failing to get any of the eight jobs for which I recently had interviews, I decided that something was definitely amiss.