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Haters Gonna Hate Because They're Haters, Says Science

I mean, beauty’s is in the eye of the beholder, and the grass isn’t actually greener until its on the other side. Have these researchers ever even heard a cliche?
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Finally, we have proof that people are just self-absorbed douchebags who don’t really like, or dislike much, they just sort of walk around reacting like they’re predisposed to. It’s not Miley Cyrus’s fault you hate her dancing. You’re just a jerk negatively disposed personality.

According to a new study, some people just dislike everything. Researchers have found that our reactions have as much to do with our personalities as whatever we’re reacting to.

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They had people evaluate how much they like things as disparate as second-hand smoke and Conan O’Brien, and came to recognize a separation between those with “positive dispositional attitude” have “strong tendency to like things” and that people with a “negative dispositional attitude” have a strong tendency to dislike things. The words "optimist" and "pessimist" don't appear.

So haters gotta hate. No shit, right? I mean, beauty’s is in the eye of the beholder, and the grass isn’t actually greener until it's on the other side. Have these researchers ever even heard a cliché? I bet they make more money than you too.

As it turns out, “positive dispositional attitudes may predispose people to have favorable expectations about the unknown, and dispositional attitudes may therefore be related to an open, curious approach to objects and experiences,” the study states. So these guileless smiling assholes wander through life seeking out new experiences, buying new products, with their wide-range of interests. The audacity.

And the others with their negative dispositional attitudes come back from the Grand Canyon talking about how dusty it was and wondering why they have to buy a new toothbrush, the old one’s just fine and didn’t have these weird bristles on the side. What are those for anyway?

“This surprising and novel discovery expands attitude theory by demonstrating that an attitude is not simply a function of an object’s properties, but it is also a function of the properties of the individual who evaluates the object,” concluded study authors Justin Hepler and Dolores Albarracín, who apparently have never met anyone ever.

This research will be published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology and will be used to sell you stuff, probably, in addition to getting someone else tenure. For the love of Pete.