The rollout to the 2016 Rio Olympics can't really get any more shit-showy. A lot of other crazy stuff has happened, but let's just focus on what happened to Chinese hurdler Shi Dongpeng this past week. Poor Shi.
According to Association Internationale de la Presse Sportiv, Shi was checking into his hotel with an accompanying cameraman on July 25—after their long flight from China—when a seemingly drunk man rushed over to Shi and vomited all over him. Shi went to the bathroom to clean up, the cameraman chased after the vomiteer (it's a word), and when the cameraman returned, he found all of his video equipment missing. (In retrospect, maybe they should have had the hurdler chase after the guy, and the cameraman hold it down.)
Upon review of surveillance footage, it appeared the "drunk" homeboy had a partner, who swooped in on the goods while Shi and the cameraman were away. I didn't breathalyze the man personally, but I think it's fair to say that dude No. 1 wasn't as drunk as he seemed. He still had some running to do on his sly-ass heist.