For my whole life, I feel like I’ve heard over and over again that weed makes sex better. People claim weed enhances the sensation of sex, it makes you cum harder, it relaxes you. The idea of combining weed and sex has been around forever.
But I’ve never been a big weed smoker, because weed always makes me paranoid and convinced that I’m peeing my pants. So, I’ve never related to the idea that weed enhances sex. But I’ve always envied people who are into it, because I think everyone knows that alcohol doesn’t make sex better. (It might make me more uninhibited, but it literally melts my vagina and decreases my ability to cum.) I envy the idea of having a recreational vice that actually increases pleasure.
So, I was wishing I could get into weed just for sex reasons, and recently I discovered that the cannabis industry has lots of new innovations around weed pleasure products. There’s aphrodisiac weed, weed lubricants, weed bubble bath, weed lollipops, and all these other things. I thought maybe I should revisit the possibility that stoned sex could be for me.
Basically, I wanted to know: If you’re someone who doesn’t love being stoned, is there a way to get just your vagina high? Deep thoughts, I know.
To try to find out, I went to San Francisco, which is essentially the epicenter of cannabis culture, and embarked on a slutty weed journey. I met a woman named Ashley Manta, who identifies as a “cannasexual,” which is essentially anyone who combines weed and sex thoughtfully and intentionally. She was my spiritual slutty weed guide and helped me to discover different products that would create the sexual high that didn’t involve having to feel super stoned. It turns out, if I use topical THC products like weed lube, my pussy can be the stoner on her own.
I also went to one of Ashley’s workshops about sex and weed and learned that I should try out different strains of weed to see how they affect my body. I found out that, apparently, other people have stoned sex for hours on end because it gives them energy—which honestly sounded exhausting to me.
After that, I went in search of some weed lube of my own. I found a little company called Quim Rock that’s run by these two awesome girls named Cyo Ray Nystrom and Rachel Washtein. They hand-make “intimate oils”—basically, weed lube—that they said makes you more wet, creates blood flow to your vagina, and functions as a vaginal health supplement. Apparently, it can also help prevent UTIs and yeast infections by decreasing vaginal dryness—which is really good because my life feels like a giant UTI sometimes. I learned a lot from them.
Next, I wanted to know how people usually get these products. So, I hung out with this female weed delivery service called Lady Chatterley’s Lover.
Basically, weed culture is still heavily male, so it’s kind of awkward for a girl to walk into a head shop and be like, “What’s gonna be good for my vagina, because I want to have a threesome later?” So, this business is an all-female weed delivery service that specializes in cannabis products that will enhance your sex life and vaginal health. But all the women who drive for them are also experts on the products, so they come inside and hang out with you and walk you through all their different effects and uses. Basically get this really knowledgeable stoner chick to just come to your door and be like, “Maybe you should try this sort of weed lube; maybe this strain will get your juices flowing, or whatever.”
I hung out with one of their “product consultants” named Kaylene Bishop while she drove her minivan to this other women’s house to deliver this huge bag of products. The customer told me that the first time she used the company’s weed lube was the first time she had multiple climaxes on her own. So, that was pretty convincing. And the interaction as a whole was just so comfortable and chill. It was really cool.
After that, I felt like I understood physically why women like combining sex and weed, but I wanted to know more about the psychological connection. Why do people find potheads so sexy?
So, I visited a small porn production company called Emerald Triangle that specializes in lesbian stoner porn. They were staging this whole porno scene where two girls get weed delivered and have a threesome with the delivery girl while smoking blunts. The performers explained to me that there’s all these people with weed fetishes, who are literally turned on by seeing smoke. It’s still a niche market, but they seemed sure that it’s gonna explode as weed goes more mainstream.
Finally, I went to a weed sex party to top off my trip. Honestly, it was a triggering experience for me because even after all my research, I didn’t realize that so many people smoked so much weed. It was crazy. There were all these THC-infused cocktails and people blowing weed into each other’s mouths, it was so terrifying.
But at the end of the day, I realized that combining weed and sex is just different for everyone. For me, it’s definitely less-is-more, but I am more open to incorporating weed into my sex life now. I like that it can be a healthier option rather than feeling like in order to relax for a sexual experience, I have to have two martinis.