NEW ORLEANS AT CHICAGO
The Bears had the most exciting player in the NFL this season in Devin Hester. If you disagree, understand that you are retarded. They also had one of the biggest assholes.And now, everyone knows that the Bears defense, due to injuries, is running on fumes at this point. And that their quarterback looks like this gambling addict, Alissa, from season one of Intervention. I'm bummed I can't find an image of her right now. Mainly it's in the eyebrows. What the hell is up with his eyebrows? And also, what's up with 90th-string QB Kyle Orton being a punch line even when Rex Grossman struggles? He didn't do that poorly last season. Eh, never mind.I have faith in Grossman, who might be able to torch the Saints man coverage in their secondary. He has to do that early--because when he has to come from behind, he turns into Brett Favre. The Bears aren't scary like they were for the first six or so games this season, and New Orleans is out of control.They have two running backs--Deuce McAllister and Reggie Bush--that can destroy you, a great QB, and I'm not concerned that they can't play in cold weather.And remember after 9/11 who won the Super Bowl? The PATRIOTS. Now, with New Orleans back at the Super Dome for the first season since their Katrina eviction, wouldn't you expect them to win the Super Bowl, so America can get their happy ending? It's a conspiracy. The game has already been played. Anyway, here's how Midwestern adult males (Bears fans) talk to one another. They say one word or two, then look around and sort of weave, then look at each other and talk again. Brilliant.Here are what I see as the keys to this game: Sean Salisbury picked the Saints. At some point in the mid-season I think he told us that Dallas and Carolina were going to be the teams to watch from the NFC, so fuck him. Everything he says is delivered with great urgency, and after a while you want to slip him some kind of drowsiness pill and then put him in an empty train car that will be sunk to the bottom of the Indian Ocean. Both Joe Theismann and Ron Jaworski picked the Saints as well. So, I will avoid the bandwagon and pick the Bears.Bears 20-Saints 17.JEFF JOHNSON
The Bears had the most exciting player in the NFL this season in Devin Hester. If you disagree, understand that you are retarded. They also had one of the biggest assholes.And now, everyone knows that the Bears defense, due to injuries, is running on fumes at this point. And that their quarterback looks like this gambling addict, Alissa, from season one of Intervention. I'm bummed I can't find an image of her right now. Mainly it's in the eyebrows. What the hell is up with his eyebrows? And also, what's up with 90th-string QB Kyle Orton being a punch line even when Rex Grossman struggles? He didn't do that poorly last season. Eh, never mind.
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