Jamie Lee Curtis Taete Interviews Jaimie Warren

Here are two of our favorite photographers from the The Photo Issue 2010 interviewing one another. Jamie Lee Curtis Taete is from the UK and Jaimie Warren from the US, but they get through this whole interview without bitching about Lockerbie or the oil spill. Instead they talk about Rosanne Barr, who is of considerably less cultural significance in England than she is in America. PS: That's JW up there, and this is JLCT down here.

Jamie Lee Curtis Taete: Did you know that you and I both almost share our names with country music singers? There's a guy called Jamie Warren and a girl called Jamie Tate.
Jaimie Warren: Yes! I saw Jamie Warren. He's a Canadian country singer! He's hot!

And if you try and Google your name, one of the recommended searches is "Jamie Warren brain tumor." I assume that's to do with him, not you.
Yep, that's him. What comes up if you Google you?

WELL, I discovered today that, if you try and google "Jamie Lee Curtis", one of the recommended searches is my name! It's about the fourth one. Right under "hermaphrodite".
Wow! That's amazing! Okay, I have a good interview question for you: Do you have respect for Roseanne Barr?

I do. I can't say I agree with every decision she's ever made. But Roseanne seasons 1-3, She Devil and threatening to kill Perez Hilton were all great.
Don't joke. This is serious.

I'm not joking. I used to be obsessed with Roseanne. I think Dan was my first love. Wait, that's creepy, I'm not gonna talk about that.
No! That's not creepy. He's hot! I'm obsessed with him too. I have a picture where my head is photoshopped on to a picture of him and Roseanne.

Have you ever been to the house where they filmed Roseanne? It's not too far from you.
No. And I drive through Illinois every time I go back home.

I don't think it's in Illinois.
Wait, am I crazy? I thought that show was in Illinois.

Well, it's set in Illinois. But the exteriors were shot in Indiana. I used to have this book of pop culture landmarks.
Weird! I thought it was filmed on a set. It looks so fake.

Oh, the interiors are on a set. They were filmed in LA. They made it look like one place through the magic of television.
That's why I don't live in LA! Everyone is always tricking you.

You live in Kansas City, right? Why do you live there and not in New York like every other photographer?
Because I hate fashion.

What's your favorite thing about Kansas City?
Cow tipping!

No way! I'm pretty sure cow tipping is just an urban legend.
No, I do it! I swear!

I feel like I read that it was possible, but only under extremely specific circumstances. Like, it will only work one time out of each ten thousand or something.
Damn. OK, I'm lying.

I knew it. Can I tell you some facts I know about Kansas City and see if you know them already?
Yes.

OK, did you know that the mouse that inspired Mickey Mouse was from KC?
Yes! I did. Walt Disney used to live here.

Did you know that the Twinkie factory is in KC? And that, contrary to popular belief, Twinkies would not survive the apocalypse? They expire after 25 days.
I didn't!

How about that jam sessions were invented in KC?
I didn't! They sound cool!

Wait, you know what a jam session is, right? There's no actual jam involved. It's a bunch of people sitting around and expressing themselves through music.
Ooohhh! Oops! No, gross.

OK, tell me about your photo in this years Photo Issue.
I'm a waitress. This was a cake made by the boss/owner/cook Beth. She made a birthday cake in the sweltering heat and scooped all the pieces up with her hand and all the red stuff was oozing down to her elbow when she was handing off the cake pieces and it was so gross. I guess it looks like, sexual or something.

You do a lot of food photos, right?
Yeah, I love food! And people say they all look sexual. Which is funny and true. Tell me about your picture. Did you make the burger? Did you eat it?

I did. It's 18 vegetarian burgers, and I shared it with my boyfriend. The picture is part of a bigger series I'm working on about the internet.
Sounds cool. Why the internet?

Because I'm obsessed with it.
Oh, I heard something about you on the internet, and I wanna ask if it's true.

Okay.
Can you guess what it is?

No… And now I'm scared.
Were you on The Hills?

What? No.
Aw, I thought I read that somewhere.

Weird! What camera do you shoot on?
A G10. Boring, I know.

Me too! That's weird, because your pictures always looks so much more colorful and crisp than mine. I must be doing it wrong. Or it might be because mine is completely fucked and held together with tape. I need a new one.
Me too! Somebody put mine in the garbage at a party. When I found it, it was swimming in salad and wine.

Dang. What's your favorite picture that you've ever taken?
My favorite photo right now is this one I just took in India. I got a grant to go there! And I'm posing in front of a lot of Indian homeless children while I kinda look like Mother Teresa or something. It's very weird.What about you? What's your fave of yours?
There have been a few that I've taken without planning that are just insane and perfect and I stare at them for hours thinking, "HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?!?" But none spring to mind. Actually, my favorite thing is when I'm on a funny picture site and I see that they've used one of my pictures. I see a lot on The Chive.

Okay, so do you think this interview is done? Is this going to be boring for people to read?

I have one more thing to ask. It's a question somebody asked me to ask you: What is your least favorite snack food?
Wow. That's a tough question. How about I give you a top 10?
1. Wheat Thins (inflammatory and high GI)
2. Most fruit flavored yogurts (loaded with sugar)
3. Premade fruit smoothies (all sugar, low fiber)
4. Vitamin Water (very little vitamins, but lots of sugar)
5. Slim Fast shakes (35+ grams of sugar - yikes!)
6. Energy drinks (disrupts adrenal glands natural production)
7. Rice cakes (super high glycemic - spikes blood sugar)
8. Most protein bars (high in sugar & fillers)
9. Granola & Nutrition bars (low fiber, high in sugars)
10. "100 Calorie" snack packs (100 empty calories…)
11. Mini pretzels (I know I only said 10, but I had to add this one too… it's all processed wheat and an awful snack)

Wow, thorough. Thanks Jaimie!

WORDS: JAMIE LEE CURTIS TAETE
OTHER WORDS: JAIMIE WARREN