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Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - All Night With Hey Ron!

It was only a matter of time before Hey Ron!’s fame transcended its already substantial internet following, and midnight tonight will be the precise moment Ronald Hemphill becomes a super-charged ball of importance on the Nonstop New York channel. At least we think it’s tonight. The All Night With Joey Reynolds website looks like it was put together in 1998, and the schedule doesn’t seem so up to date (unless Jackie “The Jokeman” Martling is having a second wind).

Taped just last night inside a fishbowl of a studio in Times Square, the producers loved Ron so much (duh) that they asked him to come back soon. Joey’s other guests—as if you care—include the owner of Nevada’s famous “Bunny Ranch” brothel and one of the Ranch’s bunnies, about whom Ron said, “Not old enough to drink but old enough to spread her legs.” Knowing Ron’s rep as Vice’s advice expert, the two sin merchants apparently started asking Ron some questions, and pretty soon the show turned into an impromptu live version of Hey Ron!

Afterwards, Ron talked about his burgeoning small-screen career like an old hand.

“I think talk shows suck. I don’t really watch them, but I’ll go on them for exposure,” he said. “The next one I would like to do is Conan or Jay Leno or the Mexican guy, George Lopez. If I had my own show I’d do it on location, and I’d ask whatever questions I wanted—I’d have all kinds of people on the show, not just celebrities.” Maybe we’re biased, but we’d watch the shit out of that.

All Night With Joey Reynolds will air on New York Nonstop at midnight tonight. Check your cable provider to find out what channel it’s on.