This 18-Carat Gold 'Kale Cuff' Can Be Yours for the Low Price of $1,400

Have you noticed your secretly family-rich #woke friends wearing what looks like golden salad wrapped around their wrists? You're not hallucinating; the new blinged-out Giuseppe Arcimboldo look is all part of Joan Hornig Jewelry's new "Lettuce Give Back" campaign in partnership with the Recipe for Success Foundation.

In the biggest new food-craze that is not a food craze to hit New York City this season, Joan Hornig is turning out a whole line of salad-inspired jewelry: mushroom earrings, cauliflower cufflinks, bracelets in both romaine and kale, the sales of each going to support Recipe for Success, which teaches kids about nutrition and how to grow their own healthy food. Steady yourself as vegetable-forward jewelry looks seem set to sweep the city's loud and proud trust-fund veganistas.

The jewelry actually looks pretty awesome, but while it is certainly for a good cause, wearing these vegetables doesn't come cheap. Those kale bracelets alone will cost you a cool $1,400—a price approximate to the wearer's monthly Sweetgreen outlay. And even though all of the profits from the jewelry does go to help Recipe for Success, that ends up working out to only about $500 of the $1,400 buyers spend on each necklace.

So, what happens when you combine two of the most obnoxious trends of the last decade—ostentatious luxury jewelry intended to show the world that the wearer is "charitable," and kale? Well, great success apparently. The first line of vegeta-baubles—feel free to use that—sold out before the unveiling party on Monday even ended. But don't worry, you can still get some for yourself through the foundation.

While you're already on its website, keep in mind that Recipe for Success does accept direct donations and will put every penny of it to good use; you just won't get anything sparkly to wear for your good deed.