Satisfyer Pro 2 review
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I Tried the Satisfyer Pro 2 Vibrator to See Why It's a Cult Fave Sex Toy

I tested the best-selling, clit-sucking sex toy to see if it’s really the one clitoral vibrator to rule them all.
MF
New York, US
October 20, 2021, 9:37pm

In the world of sex toys, the Satisfyer Pro 2 is lauded—nay, worshipped—for giving a Come Unto the Jizzy Light user experience without ever making direct contact with the clitoris, thanks to its revolutionary form of light suction. Its magic lies in its Air Pulse technology, and anyone who has a Satisfyer stashed on their nightstand is apt to tell you that it’s much more than a vibrator. It’s an epiphany, wrapped in an orgasm, wrapped in a little champagne-colored piece of medical-grade silicone. The one, the only, the most precious. 

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 It has over 45,000 impassioned reviews on Amazon that make it sounds as if it was crafted by Beezlebub himself. “By the time you hit [orgasm] number three,” writes one reviewer, “your soul will separate from your body like some Doctor Strange move. Now you've reached the need-an-Exorcism level. Palms sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, weirdly craving spaghetti.” [Snaps in beatnik.]

First, let’s backup for a bit of context. The Satisfyer Pro 2 is the second incarnation of what was already a bangin’ vibrator, engineered in 2016 by the sex toy company of the same name. Satisfyer also makes top-rated penis sleeves, and a slew of other clitoral vibrators, including one that looks like a bow tied penguin (??), but none have quite matched the Satisfyer Pro 2 in clout and revelatory reviews. The sex toy was the key to helping one journalist realize she was a squirter, and gave another what she called, “multiple fully clitoral orgasms, which never happens for me otherwise.” It's widely considered one of the best toys that mimics the sensation of receiving cunnilingus.  So, this is what we’re dealing with, which is both exciting and eyebrow raising. 

Given the immense hype, I decided to not only put the Satisfyer Pro 2 to the test, but to have a friend who has historically hated clitoral toys give one a run as well to see just how much of a Pro it really was. 

First impressions 

Traditionally, the Satisfyer Pro 2 has come in one shade of what I like to call, Rich Horse Girl Champagne; the soft, rose gold hue evokes private beaches, French tips, and moms with David Yurman jewelry. The brand also just released the vibe in two blue and lilac colorways, just to give it a little zhuzh. I chose purple, which is my favorite for sex toys as it feels less gendered: 

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When I took it out of the package, the first thing I noticed was that it was bigger than I imagined. Heavier, too, which made me wonder how it would compare with ultra-light clitoral toys like the Aer vibrator by Dame. Wrist fatigue is real, and vibes that weigh less are also apt to be better sex toys for people living with certain disabilities. The latter doesn’t apply to me, but it did make me a little sus as to why this toy had thousands of die-hard reviews. I was intrigued.   

The moment of truth 

I charged up the Satisfyer for a whole day before use, which brings me to another important Commandment: When using a sex toy for the first time, get that thing at full charge to see what you’re dealing with so you can judge it at full-operating capactiy. Some sex toys even sound louder if their motor is not fully juiced. And if quiet sex toys/not annoying your roommates is important to you, keep that in mind. 

The Satifsyer fit well in my hand when I was actually on my back. The bulk of the weight is in the handle, presumably to offer more control, I’m guessing. The head’s suction element isn’t just deep set, but cavernous, which means what for your clitoris? Well, not even a few seconds into use, I already got it. “OHHHHHHKAYYY,” said the goblins in my brain that usually rev me up to orgasm, “This thing knows what it’s doing.” It had a whisper-quiet motor, and used a blend of pulses and air pressure that fit together seamlessly. 

As for the deep set suction? My friend and I both agreed that it was the tits, and feels truly game-changing for pretty much anyone who's clitoral toy-curious but not sure where to start. 

If you want a little more pressure (me) all you have to do is turn up the intensity a tad or press down; if you want a lighter touch, like my friend, you need only rest the Satisfyer on your clit like a laurel wreath, and let it go to town. That’s because the ample suction area is key to the Air Pulse technology. Think of it as the difference between yodeling against a brick wall, and yodeling into a sparkling, amethyst cavern. Of course the latter resonates better, deeper. The sound waves fill a cave gradually, and in a more well-rounded manner that feels like a gentle tide of pleasure rather than a baseball bat to the clit. I’m actually drawing a diagram of this Hard Science on a cocktail napkin as we speak, but you’ll just have to take my word for it. 

TL; DR

As much as I wanted to find a bone to pick with the Satisfyer Pro 2, I get why this toy is a mainstay in “best sex toys” lists: 1) It’s versatile, and an ideal clitoral toy for beginner and experienced sex toy users, and 2) it seems to have cracked the design code on how to be a toy for both people with sensitive clitorises and those who want to get their pussy tenderized into schnitzel. It will have me yodeling for many spank sessions to come. 

The Satisfyer Pro 2 is available at Satisfyer, Amazon, and Ella Paradis


The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story.