Dark Meat was in the brain-vaccuum that is the Northern Midwest when they gave us the answers to the 13 questions we sent them, but now they're in Canada. Canada Canada Canada! Good Canada, where they do street-sweeping with a machine that looks like a mechanical bug and the slack-jawed guy who operates it imagines that he's using a laser. But it would be fun to zap garbage with a laser. What were we saying? Oh yes! If you're in Quebec or Ontario, the small army that is Dark Meat is headed to a city near you (unless you're in Toronto, in which case, whoooops! They played The Drake last night). After you read the answers they provided for our questionnaire you're probably going to wanna pick up a ticket to see their show, but if that doesn't convince you, go listen to their song "Success". And if that's not enough then maybe you just don't like fun, clappy songs with lyrics like, "I'm gonna fuck on the floor! I'm gonna kill me a deer!"Vice: Dark Meat, do you need to take attendance before you leave a city?Dark Meat: Absolutely. Roll-call required. We left our flautist in Baltimore, and she came back as a smack addict with a bagful of dumpster-muffins. And one time, we left Curtis the Super-roadie in Beaver Tail, Texas, to fend for himself amongst Deliverance Extras. We only remembered as we got down the highway and realized no one had called roll.Hey, have all 17 of you ever been on mushrooms at once?No, but we played a show on my birthday where 65% of us were on angel dust.Could you handle an 18th member?Shows what you know: our last west coaster, we had 22 in the bus -- 20 members. But, on this tour, it would depend on who that 18th member was. No more prison-bound psychos, that's fer sure.Do you have any other group rituals? Paintball? Sweatlodge?Pre-show face paint moan-athon leading to stageboarding where we continue to chant in "E" until the audience does so, then we bust into a song. Also, an Albert Ayler parade traversing the nearby blocks, weather, time, and attitude permitting.Does anyone in the band hunt?Our roadie Curtis is a bowhunter; we also prepare and eat roadkill if its fresh enough. No Lie!What's your favourite kill?1984 Jeep Laredo and a fresh, tasty buck.If the band could have one exotic animal companion, what would it be? (e.g. white tiger, panda…)Giant Squid: underwater ambulatory totem of unabated psychic mystery and a covertly mystical being that still confounds "the experts." Not to be seen by merely mortal eyes, my friends….Does Dark Meat have any vegetarians?Most freegans, two vegans, two veggies, the rest opportunists, and I can't eat cheese or I'll turn into a mudgun.Do you buy face paint and confetti in bulk? Does someone's sister work at a party store?Lately, we've turned to making confetti out of old newspapers. The worst ones we can find, in terms of the information conveyed. Facepaint, we're learning new techiniques therein; economy's tough all over, and its hard to find in bulk. Georgia red clay, grey chalk,
brown mud is optimal and appropriate.What's the worst job you've ever had?I was a high-impact redneck trashman employed by a fearless, shameless burn-victim for 4 yrs. Motto: "No Job Is Too Redneck". No shit. Don't ask too deeply or you'll not like me anymore.If you had a million dollars to spend on a light show, pool full of jell-O, pig launcher etc., what would it be?Mudguns. A semicircle of mudguns.What are your thoughts on Swiss Chalet's dark meat meal? It's a meal and it's all dark meat.Sounds great to me, but I'm on tour and have only eaten pb sandwiches and ramen for a week and a half. Gimme a beer and I don't care…..What are the best roadside places that you've found to eat while touring in your huge bus?Olde Tyme Grocery in Lafayette Louisiana has the greatest oyster po-boys you've ever had. Psychedelically delicious. Believe it.Dark Meat's upcoming tour dates:26 September: Call The Office London, ON
27 September: The Casbah, Hamilton, ON
28 September: Vinyl, Guelph, ON
30 September: Zaphod Beeblebrox, Ottawa, ON
1 October: Club Lambi, Montreal, PQ
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brown mud is optimal and appropriate.What's the worst job you've ever had?I was a high-impact redneck trashman employed by a fearless, shameless burn-victim for 4 yrs. Motto: "No Job Is Too Redneck". No shit. Don't ask too deeply or you'll not like me anymore.If you had a million dollars to spend on a light show, pool full of jell-O, pig launcher etc., what would it be?Mudguns. A semicircle of mudguns.What are your thoughts on Swiss Chalet's dark meat meal? It's a meal and it's all dark meat.Sounds great to me, but I'm on tour and have only eaten pb sandwiches and ramen for a week and a half. Gimme a beer and I don't care…..What are the best roadside places that you've found to eat while touring in your huge bus?Olde Tyme Grocery in Lafayette Louisiana has the greatest oyster po-boys you've ever had. Psychedelically delicious. Believe it.Dark Meat's upcoming tour dates:26 September: Call The Office London, ON
27 September: The Casbah, Hamilton, ON
28 September: Vinyl, Guelph, ON
30 September: Zaphod Beeblebrox, Ottawa, ON
1 October: Club Lambi, Montreal, PQ