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Don’t you feel better about yourselves now?Oh… wait. You don’t like this song? You don’t want someone to “tofu all over you”? What about the part that references your “slanted eyes”? Still bad? Huh…What if I said this song was satirical? Would that help?No?OK, I guess this video is actually pretty RACIST-Everyone always tells me, “Dave, NFL players are not racist. How could they be? They spend so much time hanging out with people of different ethnicities. By definition, they are totally accepting of all the colors of the rainbow.” It’s totally true that NFL players are saints who can do no wrong… unless they are drunk at a country music concert. In which case, they will want to “fight every ni**er” they see.
Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Riley Cooper felt that insatiable urge to say the N-word at, of all places, a Kenny Chesney concert. The irony of his comment is that the security guard he'd just tried to assault was probably the only black person for 100 miles.Cooper apologized, which makes him a real-life “accidental racist,” I guess.When a public figure is caught saying something racist, their first instinct is always to say they are “disgusted with themselves.” They’re all like, “I am ashamed!” Usually, I’m ashamed when I take the last slice of pizza without asking. At least I got a slice of delicious pizza out of the bargain. Not sure what Riley Cooper got by saying the N-word, other than a nice, fat suspension, and probably also a shit ton of pranks at his expense after practice. Riley, promise me you won’t ask your teammates why there are eyeholes cut in your nice, clean, white towel. Just accept it. RACIST
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