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Music

Peaches And Larry Tee Discuss Dogs

On Tee's new video "Charlie," featuring Chihuahua Del Rey, Stinky Minaj, Amy Doghouse, and more.

We asked seminal DJ/promoter/producer/hipster-before-it-was-cool-and-then-not-cool Larry Tee to give us a little background info on the following conversation between him and everyone's favorite WTF-inducing electroclash artist, Peaches. We've decided to leave his response as-is because, well, you'll see.

Ok. Peaches has always rocked ass! We met in 2002 when we did the lady-heavy electroclash tour with Chicks on Speed, WIT, and Tracy and the Plastics. The 2 vans were split between the super-serious Chicks/Tracy van and the less-serious ultra-fun party van with the sexy WIT girls, Peaches, and myself. OMG, van riding with Peaches is like having cable since she is so hyper. It was literally like….click, click, click, station station station…then stop the van for a quick pee!

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As for WHY…They decided dogs need a voice to express themselves so that's why they wanted to do this interview - to be the voice of those who can not express themselves….

Dogs.

PEACHES: You made this video and it features dogs. I actually just went to Document That—it’s a huge art festival that happens every five years—and one of the pieces that everyone was talking about was a dog park. You couldn’t enter the area without a dog. So, basically, this was art for dogs. When I saw your video, it made me wonder: Did you make this video for humans or for dogs?
LARRY: Oh yeah, dogs. You know, I’ve been feeling dogs want to express themselves more fully recently and I thought, well, often many dogs get cold at night and during the day, especially in cities like London and Berlin. So they need a little extra hair, I think…

Yeah, and you don’t want your dog to just have extra hair; it should be somewhat indicative of their personality. When you were picking the dogs for the video did they have to audition? What about Chihuahua Del Rey?
A typical audition is we made them walk the runway just so that we could see if they had good runway style—whether they had moves necessary. We also did, like, a fan test to see if they could move their hair back and forth like in a hair commercial.

Right, but I was wondering, say your auditioning…I forget the dog name for Winehouse.
Oh yeah. Amy Doghouse.

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Amy Doghouse for instance—the dog who was more jittery, ya know? Doghouse, as opposed to Chihuahua Del Rey standing still, looking a bit sullen…Was it more based on look or personality?
It’s a combination. Modeling is often based on look, whether it's humans or dogs.

Well, you can change all that, Larry. You have the power to change that!
I know…but we didn’t make the dogs lose weight or anything for this particular shoot. But, for example, Carlito, who performs as Chihuahua Del Rey, has a hard time keeping his tongue in his mouth, so almost every shot looks sexier. 'Cause a Chihuahua with his tongue hanging out—let’s face it: it's sexy. It turns me on.

So does that dog speaks for sexy? When a human has their tongue out…it’s not usually sexy…
Usually, it means they want water…

They want water, they want sex; they have a sense of wanting and that’s the point, I guess.
Yeah, i think that’s also the same with human models; you want to keep them thirsty and you want to keep them hungry, 'cause they tend to look better when they’re hungry and thirsty

Right… and also have more passion.
Yeah, they have more fire in their eyes when you don’t feed them or give them water…They’re more alive on film!

Doing a video where no dogs were harmed in anyway?
I’m just kidding…We did not harm any, but I did choose Carlito, who plays Chihuahua Del Rey. Also, at the end of the film, you see me as David Guetta with a dog in my hand

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Oh, so that’s who you are! Because you had long hair and glasses…
Yeah, a David Guetta-thing. You know, being a competitive DJ in a very competitive DJ world, I thought, "Well, I should emulate the big guy," so I did that kind of look. That’s Cathy Guetta as the dog in my arms. If you look at the cover shot of DJ Dog Magazine, it’s me and Cathy Guetta….sort of

Did you ever consider maybe doing one with DJs, like having Too Many Dogs or David Guetta, but like a Guetta Shepherd?
I know, I didn’t do a dog as David, but I thought the least I could do is a dog as Cathy Guetta.

Do you think there’s a future in that? Maybe, like, representing the DJs also, rather than exclusively pop star women?
Paul Oakenfold!

Paul. Very good.
Maybe Armin Van…Bulldog.

There you go! This is the beginning of a dog revolution for art and fashion and music….Dogs have their own psychiatrists, they have their own art pieces that humans aren’t allowed unless accompanied by a dog—So you’re part of a dog revolution, Larry.
Well, I think the dog revolution has been going on for some time. If you Google "dogs in wigs"…Or, I’m sure, #dogsinwigs will pop up soon just like #ChihuahuaDelRey…It’s funny, in America you can marry a dog before you can marry a gay person in some states.

…..
No, wait…In some states, you can have relations with a dog before relations with a gay.

I wonder if they consider bestiality in some states the same thing—sex with animals and sex with gays.
Back to dog things…

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Of course, there’s the famous video of the poodles doing aerobics, you know?
Yeah, I’ve seen that.

I think that fits into your dog revolution. I would like to ask you too, do you think you’ll start a new movement like Electrodogclash…?
Well, it did cross my mind, because I’ve always been a leader, not a follower. I want to set the trends, and for a lot of people, I helped bring in transvestitism with RuPaul’s big hit "Supermodel" in ‘92. Then with the club kids of the Party Monster era, you know, gave people the right to dress like an absolute clown, which I think is a God-given right and something that should be observed.

Do you have any plans to make a dog club?
Well—er—dogs, for the most part, don’t like loud music. We would probably have to find something else to make them excited, like playing dog videos…or just playing videos off cuteoverload.com to get them all excited. Because actually, I don’t think many people really like house music. They just settle for house music, you know? But dogs, they're even harder to fool than most people.

Dogs like to sing, actually. [Howls] Maybe there could be some sort of dog meetings where they could do dog choirs they could learn how to, you know, like, smell food….Or they could do games, like put a dog in a room with a bunch of food and see if it eats its way out, 'cause they’ll just eat and eat and eat….
It’s true. Well, you know, the great thing about dogs and why we love them so much is they really don’t do what you really want them to do. Even if they’re great singers, all they’re gonna do is fart. It’s their nature—'cause they’re smarter than us, really. I mean, we will dance, we will sing, we will put on tap shoes and go on X Factor and just give it our all and tell everybody about our family tragedies and all that. But dogs, they’re really discreet. They just do what they want to do as soon as you try to get them to perform.

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I disagree, because if a dog wants a treat if it’s food related he will jump through hoops, sit, lay down…So, I mean, the motivation is different; it’s not fame, it’s food. That was my other question: Can you think of, like, an X Factor for dogs? Like Best in Show?
I’ve seen Best In Show and it was great. And I can’t help but think there’s a huge audience for X Factor for dogs. I just noticed there’s the new Ugliest Dog in the World contest. Did you see the winner?

Was it a dog that looks like this? [Makes a horrifying face]
Yeah! With scary long fingernails like claws, and it's a Chinese Crested, which seems to always win "Ugliest Dog." It’s always the Chinese Crested…'Cause they don’t have much hair, just tuffs of hair in embarrassing places…

Do you think maybe that will be the subject of your next video?
Well, if your video doesn't have Rihanna or Bieber, it better have kids or dogs. So after having done dogs this time, I’ve already shot my next one with children portraying adults. Kicking it to Roxy Cottontail, trying to pick up Roxy, who is an adult, but the kids are all acting like they got swagga—which is an American term, Peaches, for, you know, "attitude."

Explain that to me…Hmm…Swagga!
Swagga!

I live in Berlin; I don’t know these things. You know the video by Eric Wareheim for "Kids" by the band MGMT had kids. Quite…evil kids…Awesome kids.
Oh yeah, I remember seeing that. That was really dark

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Then there’s videos of kids playing adults.
Yeah, even Biggie Smalls—they had that one with Biggie and P. Diddy hanging out as kids (we know Biggie wasn’t hanging out with no P. Diddy at that time). It was probably super cute compared to the original Biggie and Diddy.

Did any dogs fall in love with each other? Were there any relationships sparked between the dogs?
Weirdly, we did find out that Penny Griffin, who is the daughter of Boso and Brook, the designers, found quite an attraction to Amy Doghouse, who is also a Griffin, so they’re actually cousins. Dogs don’t really care so much about romance, though—the one that played Stinky Minaj fell in love with Amy Doghouse.

I thought of the perfect public venue for dogs to interact with each other instead of, like, laboratory dark rooms and glory holes. Just have, like, ass-licking places so they can freely lick each other and smell each other’s assholes, 'cause that’s what dogs really want to do.
Well, I think that’s what everybody wants to do, Peaches.

Now we’re getting to the root to it! But you know, like, dogs will just lick each other’s assholes.
No, it’s true, they have no shame about it.

They can just have a place where they can do trains.
I love that; that’s really good idea.

Well, Larry—one more thing: Woof woof!
You’re terrible.

@larrytee21

@peachesnisker