It’s becoming more and more evident that the interwebs can’t survive more than six months without a terrible pop song spreading across it like an aggressive Australian bushfire. Cue Taylor Allyn; a classically trained singer and songwriter from LA making a strong claim for next patron of LOLpop with her single “Mass Text”.In fitting with the technophile nature of 2013, it’s all about the disappointment of not being involved in a mass text with lyrics that nag: "Why didn't I get your mass-text? I'm in your contacts!". Maybe because she’s not tech savvy enough to sort her text settings or she’s a creep who plays with Barbies.
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It goes without saying that this has the potential to trump the whole of meme-dom in the same way that Rebecca Black attempted to eternally spoil the fifth day of the week. Since we last checked, “Friday” was on 55,278,470 views meaning that there’s still a bit of work to do. Yet, in under a day, Tay has managed to receive over 1,300 thumbs down to just 114 thumbs up. Score!The 24-year-old is a recent graduate from the USC School of Theatre and Music…seriously. Then there’s her bio which is just about as rhetorically unhelpful as asking someone who’s been run over if they’re okay:"Tay has created a new breed of Pop that's like Ke$ha without the sex, and Gaga without the avant garde- what are you left with?"I really don’t know what I’ve been left with, but I don’t like it. Somewhat disturbingly, Justin Timberlake and his MySpace baby have apparently labelled her as a “top upcoming artist of 2013”. If this is indeed true then it’ll be the first time that a single YouTube video has managed to put the last nail in the coffin of a social network. Either that, or this is all a well thought out marketing ploy by JT and his cronies to boost their views.
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