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The night before he was supposed to leave for VoV, Zack Kouns (of Social Junk) stayed up all night and got blackout drunk with his girlfriend, then decided to leave early for the festival and hit up a casino. He left at 5 AM, drove an hour to the casino, and slept in his car until it opened at 7 AM. He then gambled away $450 and headed on to VoV. He claimed he "wasn't worried about the money" because he had plans to go to another casino that offers free massages while you bet on his way home. "Gambling is my new lifestyle. It supplements my income and I hardly ever lose." His favorite games are Texas Hold 'Em, Roulette, Black Jack, and betting on horses.
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Social Junk was scheduled to perform at VoV but didn't because Heather cancelled at the last minute to marry her fiancé in Las Vegas on the night they were scheduled to perform. "I can believe Heather would flake, but she could get married any day--why now?" a member of her band pondered. Heather was unavailable for comment.

As the night went on the drug dealers became apparent. There was a guy from Jersey who had Molly, and a girl from Chicago had ecstasy and gallons of whiskey. Twig (Nautical Almanac) was rumored to be on Shrek, and Lavender (Cock E.S.P.) lost her mushrooms. About 85 percent of the people in attendance were under the influence of the aforementioned drugs. And no one had a scale.A Long Walk
Aaron Hibbs (Sword Heaven, etc.) drove the gear back and forth from the stage to the parking lot for people this year. I overheard Aaron telling Rat Bastard that he is leaving Baltimore after VoV to start his practice walk for when he hula hoops around the world in 2012. He will be walking from Baltimore to the West Coast. Rat told him, "I knew a guy who tried to walk from Moscow to Mexico City who quit when he got to Siberia." Aaron smiled and said, "Yeah, Siberia's pretty rough."

played Friday night and the entire crowd danced like they were at a rave. Then, a trend that started when Ren began playing under his Container moniker kicked in. It starts with one dude jumping on stage and dancing very close to Ren while he is playing, and then other guys follow. It happened at this year's INC in Miami, and again at VoV. Two buddies dry humped in front of the gear table. Then they tried to grind on Ren. "It's a total bummer," Schofield told Noisebloid, "I take it as a sign of the times, a bad omen."
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+ Mark McGuire’s (Emeralds) favorite bands in order: Mariah Carey, Luther Vandross, Aaliyah, Ashanti, and Babyface.
+ DJ DogDick (pictured above) is the R. Kelly of Noise.
+ Lexie Mountain Boys give the Laundry Room Squelchers a new and improved band name: Drunk Dad.Into the Night
After the bands on Friday, there was a disco dance party until six in the morning. The fucked up people stayed up and danced and the weary went to their tents. Noisebloid headed to bed around 6 AM, but not before we noticed Pete Death's Riley walk Lavender into the night, just minutes after her brief make-out session with Nathan Tusco.Word on the Street
From Noisebloid contributor Brian Bloomerth (Gnarwhalz):
+ Andy Stores from Weyes Blood doesn't know how to read.
+ Stoney and Liz's daughter Lucy is cute, but Liz hopes she doesn’t inherit Ben's fashion sense or his forehead.
+ That guy walking around in the tie-dye shirt all weekend named Ben is THE Ben from Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream.
+ Spencer Clark's dick looks like a taquito. That’s why he's into health food.

On Saturday night, Val Martino (Unicorn Hard-On) DJed between bands. Throughout the night someone kept stealing her McCafe cup with a mixed vodka drink in it. She kept finding it on the other side of the stage. During Spencer Clark's set, the cup turned up missing again. "See!" Val said. "Where the fuck is my drink?" Then her boyfriend, Ren Schofield, told her, "So I saw this guy drinking your drink and I was about to tell you when I saw him put powder down the straw. I thought he was going to roofie you and I was ready to approach him when he started drinking it so I figured you didn't want it."
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Who hid their Black & Milds in the woods under a pile of sticks?Blind Item Update
The Black & Milds were hidden up in a tree and the pile of sticks was like an "X marks the spot" marker underneath.

On Sunday morning, Squelcher Lauren decided she needed some real food and some hot coffee so she drove into town to a small diner. All the church-goers were there, as was the chief of police, Ernie Triplett. Chief Triplett took a seat next to Lauren at the bar and began talking to her. Over breakfast Lauren told him how she was camping and it was freezing at night and she didn't have a blanket. They parted ways.As Lauren drove back to the campground, she looked in her rearview mirror and saw a cop. The cop put on his lights and pulled her over. She realized it was Ernie and exclaimed, "I didn't forget to pay! I even tipped 80 percent! What did I do?" Chief Triplett just wanted to give her a blanket and winter jacket that were in the trunk of his cruiser. His last name was even embroidered on the inside of the coat. Then he told her to be careful driving on the roads, because he just pulled over some "weirdos" and showed her a giant bag of weed and pills he had confiscated from them."Yeah, be careful, because if people are drinking and taking these pills while driving, you don't want to be on the road," he said.Lauren said she'd take his jacket back to the diner on her way out. "I can't take this on the plane." She also mentioned he had like 16 pens in the pockets and his pay stub, "which I'll throw out before returning because I think he'd be embarrassed if he knew I knew how much he made."