Stoners have been faring pretty well these days, since the majority of 2020 and early 2021 necessitated sitting around our houses eating delivery pad see ew for the third time this month and binge-watching the most brain-meltingly insipid streaming series we can find. With recreational cannabis use legal in more and more places with each passing election cycle, and the holiday season quickly approaching, it’s a good time to start thinking about what you’re going to be gifting your stoner pals this year.
Great news on that front: Weed stuff has gotten really inventive, and so much better looking than the old rainbow blown-glass pipes we used to hide in a pair of rolled-up socks in high school. Whether you’re looking for a classy lighter case or some dry mouth lozenges, you need venture no further, reader.
Lord Jones CBD body lotion
Lord Jones has no shortage of high-class CBD-infused products, but its ultra-moisturizing body lotions are tops. Every pump of lotion is infused with full-spectrum CBD, and the light grapefruit fragrance means that when someone asks "What kind of lotion are you wearing?" you'll take it as a compliment.
A mellow buzz, like the days of yore
Buy your stoner pals a few packs of joints from Dad Grass, an L.A.-based company that sells organic CBD joints that contain less than 0.3 percent THC, which offer a mellow buzz with all the chill and none of the paranoia. “I find that about half a joint will get me the right kind of not-really-faded, like the light, smiley feeling you have a couple of hours after hitting a bubbler,” Adam Rothbarth recently wrote for VICE in his review of the stuff.
Yes, CBD-infused pajamas are a thing
OK, look: We know this sounds a little crazy, but one of your faithful Rec Room writers tested these CBD-infused pajamas out and found them surprisingly legit. “After about 45 minutes of having them on, around 9 PM, I realized I was walking from room to room of my apartment kind of aimlessly,” Mary Frances Knapp wrote for VICE in a full review. “I realized I was super relaxed. I realized I felt… kind of stoned?”
A tincture that tastes like buttered popcorn
“Standard Dose is the first retailer I’ve visited that made me feel like I found my people,” Mary Frances Knapp wrote for Rec Room. “After about 15 minutes, it just felt like someone took away the gongs from the anxiety monkeys in my brain. I didn’t feel spaced out or hyper-connected to my doomscroll self in a way I think a lot of people who work from home do. I just… relaxed, slowed down, and cooled out.”
Soft sheets for ultra-comfy weed naps
There’s nothing better than getting stoned and slithering under some soft sheets. Your pothead pals will love the moisture-wicking, durable-yet-smooth feel of this set by our favorite linen-slingers at Buffy. “Linen wicks away moisture better than cotton, and its long staple creates a fabric that is as soft as it is durable,” Buffy CEO Leo Wang told VICE, “[so] a high-quality linen sheet set can stand up to decades of use [...] There’s a huge difference between sleeping in linen compared to your average cotton or microfiber sheet set.”
A CBD energy drink to help make exercise suck less
It’s a downright lie that all stoners are lazy couch potatoes. First of all, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being a lazy couch potato. Secondly, tons of people who smoke pot are also gym rats. If that sounds like the cannabis-lover in your life, Offfield, a CBD energy drink, is the perfect gift. No medical claims, of course, but one of our editors did test this stuff out and loved it: “I felt like I could hike forever, trekking endlessly without a care in the world,” she wrote for Rec Room. “We carried on for another couple of hours, including on a very long climb with a pretty steep grade, but I felt no exhaustion.”
A Deadhead apron for baking while baked
[Adds to cart.] Anything from the chefware purveyors at Hedley & Bennett is going to be a) sick and b) sturdy as hell. This collab with The Grateful Dead—the band’s first official foray into the apron game—is the perfect gift for your bud who likes to bake whilst baked.
A subscription snack box for the munchies
Subscription boxes are some of the most perfect last-minute gifts that don’t require shipping. Giving your stoner friend a monthly snack box subscription is essentially like having a massive 7-Eleven run dropped off on their doorstep every few weeks. (In other words, they’re gonna love it.)
Room spray to get rid of… odors
While one of the great joys of having your own place is being able to smoke indoors, sometimes you don’t want your living room to smell like a weed farm. That’s where this room spray by P.F. Candle Co. comes in. Gift this to your buds so they can finally let their parents check out their apartment.
A sploof so they can blast off in secret
Just because some of our stoner pals have to blast-off in secret, doesn’t mean they need to break out the ol’ toilet paper tube/dryer sheets combo from high school. It’s 2021—we’re buying Big Boy Sploofs now. The aptly named Sploofy is a great choice for keeping your THC consumption on the DL.
A robot vacuum to suck up weed crumbs
If one of your stoner pals could roll a fat blunt with the dusting of errant weed crumbs that cover their living space, it might be time for a little robotic help. Instead of buying them a broom, let them continue to melt into the couch while their iRobot Roomba does the hard work for them. They’ll love you for it, and you won’t have to keep your shoes on when you stop by for a sesh.
A stash jar that doubles as an art piece
Long gone are the days of your bud keeping their buds in an Altoids tin or bright orange pill bottle. No, we’re all grown up, which means we have a lil’ extra cash to spend on this beautiful Full Moon Jar by Eleni Kantos. Pothead-core, but make it #art.
A mushroom night light
They’re just… so cute. Give these LED mushroom night lights to your stoner pal who wants to replace the tapestry on their wall, but also wants to preserve the psychedelic ~vibes~ they’ve spent so long cultivating.
A scalp massager
Yes, these are real—as real as the love your baked buddy will feel for you once you bestow this elite head-scratching device upon them. Besides feeling amazing, this scalp massager helps invigorate blood flow to the scalp, which in turn helps promote healthy hair, exfoliate the scalp, distribute natural oils, and control flakiness.
Honorable mention: this next-level shroom canister
Mushrooms really are having a moment, which is why even bougie designers like Jonathan Adler are taking notice and keeping it classy when it comes to storing your stony boomers like they’re on display in a 19th-century Victorian parlor.
Now throw on some Enya and sail away, stoney friends.
The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story.