Money

What to Do if Re-Entry Fun Is Bleeding You Dry Financially

Hunt for deals, splurge thoughtfully, and be upfront with your friends (and honest with yourself!) about money stuff.
Katie Way
Brooklyn, US
A group of friends of varying genders making a toast
PHOTO BY ALYZA ENRIQUEZ FOR THE GENDER SPECTRUM COLLECTION.

Being outside is back, baby! But unfortunately, after sixteen-odd months of being housebound, a lot of us are coming to the same conclusion at the same time: Doing stuff is expensive. And if you’re someone who experienced a major life change thanks to the pandemic—like moving, getting laid off, missing work due to illness, or having to support family members in any of the aforementioned situations—odds are the cost of summer fun has you sweating already. You might even be avoiding your bank account at all costs, because the thought of knowing exactly how much cash you have is too stressful.

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But just because you’re on shaky footing money-wise doesn’t mean you’re doomed to sit inside until the weather cools down! You’re just going to have to put in a little extra effort to demystify your finances, both for yourself and for the people you’ll be spending the summer with. “Money is a sensitive issue, especially if our sense of worth or identity is tied to it,” Perpetua Neo, a therapist who specializes in dealing with financial anxiety, told VICE. “Like death and sex, finances are the ‘occult’ thing— the thing that’s hidden in the shadows. Whilst some information should not be handed over freely to others, we could all benefit from learning what we could say, and how to say it.” 

Need help figuring out where to start? Here are a few ways to work around the tremendous, stupid stressor that is money in order to have the kickass, memory-making, chaos summer you deserve.

Budget (and stick to it!)

The first thing you need to do, after making a frank assessment of your finances, is set up a budget. Kimberly Palmer, a personal finance expert from NerdWallet, suggested the 50/30/20 method: Put 50 percent of your monthly income into needs, like groceries, bills, and rent; 30 percent into wants, like shopping, taking trips, or going out with friends; and 20 percent towards debt repayment and savings. 

“One of the biggest pitfalls is not thinking about budgeting at all, which is especially easy to do if you are worried about overspending to such an extent that you try to avoid thinking about budgeting altogether,” Palmer told VICE.” But taking just half an hour to review your spending from the previous month and to think about what adjustments you would need to make to reach the 50/30/20 targets can really help you get on track and find room for the things in your budget that you really want to spend on, like entertainment or travel.”

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Set a timer, grit your teeth, and get to tracking: Your wallet and your future self will thank you. 

Become a deals hound

Now that you’ve got your budget on lock, it’s time to do a little research. Remember all that online shopping and price-comparing you did during quarantine, when you had hours to devote to finding the cheapest lucite coffee table on the entire internet? Now you get to turn that obsessive energy towards something that’s only sliiiiightly less fun: shopping for tickets, flights and hotel deals! 

If there’s a show or an event you want to go to, see if there’s any kind of presale discount, or wait until the last minute and search for someone trying to pawn their pass off online. If you’re dying to hit the pool or the beach, check in with your local parks department for public options so you don’t end up paying a premium for no reason. If there’s an exhibition that you’ve been dying to see, poke around the museum website to see if it offers any free days, or call to inquire about student, corporate, or military discounts.

When it comes to travel, there’s approximately a jillion resources for finding discount flight and accommodation options. We like Scott’s Cheap Flights, Skyscanner, and Hopper for snagging airfare deals, and  NerdWallet’s resource on hotel deals has a few great suggestions for snagging a bargain room, like comparing prices between sites like Expedia and Kayak, or even directly contacting a hotel to negotiate a rate (and it’s not a bad idea to check in on how it’s dealing with COVID, too). There’s also the cheapest lodgings option of them all: Staying with a friend or family member, and paying them back with an offer to crash on your couch the next time they visit your city. 

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BYO everything

This summer, go full prepper mode every time you head out the door—think reusable water bottles, sunscreen, a light jacket, a phone charger, or change for the bus so you don’t have to catch an Uber at sky-high prices. Not only will your less prepared friends thank you, but you’ll avoid racking up costs buying stuff you already had at home. 

It’s also smart to pack a snack or two if you’re going to be out for long stretches of time, or going on a grocery run at home before heading to the woods for a long weekend of hiking with friends to cut down on the cost of grabbing food on the go or eating out 24/7.

There’s also the more traditional B in BYOB: grabbing beverages at the grocery store and breaking them out so you’re not paying parkside bar prices for a Modelo or a “cocktail” that’s basically just grapefruit juice and mezcal. It’s only tacky if you feel bad, or if it disrupts the occasion for other people. Bringing a flask to a concert to dodge the inevitable 800 percent upcharge? Fine in our book! Bringing your own food to a friend’s five-person birthday dinner? Maybe not.

Palmer cautioned that this kind of prep will be especially key when you’re traveling on a budget. “A lot of people make the mistake of factoring in only the big costs, like the price of the airline ticket or hotel stay, but forgetting to consider all of the incidentals that add up, from renting a car to eating out or even for lost income while you are away,” Palmer said. “Traveling can be expensive because you are often paying to eat out for three meals a day, on top of all the other costs.” Pack heavy to avoid spending way more than you anticipated on junk that probably won’t even make it into your suitcase home. 

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Be honest with your friends and loved ones about what works for you 

The best way to avoid financial awkwardness when it comes to making plans? Being upfront as early as possible. That way, everyone can calibrate their expectations without feeling guilty—either for not having as much financial wiggle room, or for accidentally planning something totally unaffordable. “It’s so important to talk openly about everyone’s budget before committing to expenses and to make sure the person most stressed about finances feels comfortable,” Palmer said. “That might mean going with the lowest-cost option or even subsidizing a friend or family member who is going through a tough time.” While it might seem intense to take someone up on spotting you, rest assured that they’re only offering because they want you to be there and they know you’d do the same if the roles were reversed.

If your friends, your partner, or your family members are making grand summer plans that you got pulled into later in the game, things get a little trickier. It might feel easier to grin and put it on your credit card rather than speaking up about your worries, but staying silent isn’t really a sustainable option.  “A big thing that fuels financial anxiety is shame— thinking that you’re (morally) deficient and a special snowflake who’s got unique money problems. It happens to many of us,” Neo said. “Acknowledging your shame and all the emotions beneath it empowers you. That way, you can start to make longer-term decisions rather than [spending] to medicate your shame or discomfort away.” 

Either way, using clear, “I” statements will help take the stress out of planning for every budget—as will knowing when to say no and suggest a cheaper alternative. “If you feel it’s okay to say it’s out of your financial means, you could use ‘Right now, this is not something I should be spending on, so I’ll decline,’” Neo said. “And if it’s true, add ‘When this changes in the future, I’d love to reopen this conversation.’ You could then suggest an alternative activity or activities, ending with ‘what do you think?’ so the conversation is two-way.” 

Basically, make this a “hot open communication summer,” and a tight budget won’t stand in the way of a good time.

Follow Katie Way on Twitter.