Like natural wine and e-girl makeup, CBD has gone fully mainstream. And while we’re here for it, there have been many times when we’ve wondered if all of this [dumps out potato sack] is just a bunch of 21st-century snake oil. I mean, CBD is in our drinks, gummies, and socks. It’s even in our sex lives, or trying to be, as evidenced through a rise in cannabis lubes, arousal oils, and other sexy hemp treasures you can find in dispensaries and on mega sex retailer websites like Adam & Eve, Ella Paradis, and Babeland.
But all these horny, promising CBD potions might indeed be one of the best ways to reap the alleged benefits of the compound (such as reduced anxiety and muscle pain relief). Of course sex and CBD are peas in a pod. Studies have shown that cannabis use can result in higher sexual satisfaction and better orgasms. Lubricants, tinctures, oils, and what-have-you are not only primo for life tools to have on hand for getting in le mood, but can really help people who have vaginal dryness during sex, and especially those going through menopause. As VICE writer Ryan Bassil explained in a whopper review of various CBD goodies, “You’re going to need to splash out to feel any real benefit from CBD.” So, yeah. Fetch that lube cannon.
Adding lube—especially lube packed with feel-good compounds—to sex is like adding Maldon salt atop a hot chocolate chip cookie. Think of it as a garnish for your fun bits—and with the added muscle-relaxing effects of CBD, why would you ever get that sauce on the side?
The cannabinoid x sexual pleasure crossover products make so much sense, really, that it’s almost embarrassing for us to be having this National Treasure epiphany. Yes, CBD will affect everyone differently in the sack, but if you’re going to give it a go, these cannabinoid sexessories (sorry) are some of the top-rated gems on the market.
Full-body massage oil
If you just want to start off by dipping your toes in the world of sensual CBD, do it via this full-body massage oil. It’s the ideal gateway product to CBD Lube Town, with 400 milligrams of CBD in that horny brown bottle; there’s also other soothing stuff like jojoba, vitamin E (great for skin repair), eucalyptus, peppermint, lavender, and a smorgasbord of other refreshing and calming ingredients that have reviewers going bananas for its effects. “I’m not sure if it’s a placebo effect,” writes one person, “but I was surprised how it calmed my shoulder ache I often suffer from! Also smells amazing; “The anti-inflammatory results are remarkable,” says another, “Nothing else worked for me.”
Papa & Barkley, Releaf Body Oil, $40 at Standard Dose
A love potion so good, people are making graphs about it
Foria spared no expense with their cauldron on this one. Not only is this brand one of the best-rated out there, but their CBD lube is a five-star product that is so game-changing, it inspired a number of graph-filled articles about how much it’s helped release tension, as well as improve orgasms during sex and masturbation. “As our first zero-THC product,” says the Foria team, “we formulated Awaken with synergistic botanicals plus broad-spectrum CBD from hemp—which has numerous beneficial effects, including decrease in muscular tension, enhanced blood flow and decreased pain signaling.” As a reviewer named Shawna says, “My vagina felt so warm and cozy and melty like a big hug 10 minutes after application and orgasm. This feeling lasted for at least 30 min[utes] while I was moving on with my life and getting ready for a night out.” Damn. You go, Shawna.
Foria Intimacy Natural Lubricant 200mg, $44 at Direct CBD Online
This nightstand duo sets the mood
Why do so many lubes and arousal gels have all the visual sex appeal of Crest toothpaste? (Looking at you, Dynamo Delay Spray.) It’s very boner-deflating to le mood to have to reach across to your nightstand and grab something that looks like OxiClean for your partner’s nethers. Thank goddess Common Bond has made a kit that keeps the mood; this package gets you the 500-milligram CBD arousal oil, with notes of lavender and sage, and the hydrating lube (also 500 milligrams of full spectrum CBD). They’re both vegan, cruelty-free, made with zero additives, and look like they fell off Tom Ford’s nightstand.
Common Bond Kit, $100 at Standard Dose
This humble Kentucky farm lube
This feels like something we’d gift our Stardew Valley crush. “[It’s a] true Seed-to-Shelf product,” say the folks at Ananda about the lube, “There are 250mg of hemp-derived cannabinoids per bottle, all cultivated from sun-grown cannabis on our own farms in Kentucky.” There are no pesticides, heavy metals, or other nasty chemicals that you wouldn't want on your most precious parts, and "[it] is pH balanced and sugar-free to ensure safety in delicate tissue.” A mighty fine, Old McDonald greaser for thine spank bank.
Ananda Touch Hemp Bliss Intimate Oil, $59 at Bellesa Boutique
Your on-the-go packets
In addition to those American Girl Doll-sized bottles of Tajín, we will be carrying around smol packets of CBD lube everywhere we go this summer as freshly vaccinated super sluts, safely traipsing the city in search of genital adventures with our chicken bag sidekick, because, yes, these are made by the same Kentucky farm people.
Ananda Touch Bliss Intimate Oil 10mg CBD Single-Use Packets, $14.99 at Direct CBD Online
The one that feels like a vacation
You’re sitting in a solo, beachside cabana. No one is pressing you, save the iguana painting your toenails. The sun is hot. The hunks are vaccinated. Your vagina smells like sea air and coconuts, thanks to the genies at Foria who’ve created this organic, sustainably harvested coconut oil lube. (ICYMI: coconut oil is not only a great butter substitute when baking, but a choice natural lube. Mix some CBD in there, and you’re golden.) There’s nothing with a scary chemical name in there either, as evidenced by the three single ingredients: coconut oil, cannabis, and cannabidiol. All natural. All lickable.
Foria Intimacy CBD Lubricant, $54.99 at Babeland
This psychedelic explainer book on CBD and sex
...does Taschen know about this? This art book is so specific, and so swank. Merry Jane's The CBD Solution: Sex is part practical explainer on how/why/where CBD can enhance your sex life, and part psychedelic, artistic homage to the sensual side of cannabis. “The book features go-to recipes such as CBD lube and CBD mocktails, as well as bedroom activities, like using breathwork to enhance your sexual experience,” reads the description to this great come-hither coffee table book.
Chronicle Books Merry Jane’s The CBD Solution: Sex, $19.95 at Verishop
Honorable mention: au natural shibari
We imagine that artfully tying up our partner(s) with this would make us feel like a sexy sailor. This rope is pure, old-fashioned hemp. No gimmicks, no tricks, because hemp material has innate benefits of its own, namely that it’s very skin-friendly and antimicrobial. This rope is supple but firm with its three-strand twist and secure metal tips, so it won’t open or fray whilst you starfish your lover. (This stunnah is also very much on sale, soooo...)
Shibari Natural Hemp Bondage Rope,
$40.99 $26.99 at Ella Paradis
Massage and bon voyage, sweet beans.
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