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Alison: Very miserable. I went to one in Reykjavik a few times and have always had fond memories of it. Thanks for taking me out to lunch, though I didn't really want this much.

There weren't very many, but they hadn't been changed since the 70s or something, so all the decor was more vintage than this. And you could get bread sticks.

I don't know, I never wanted one when I was ten.They were quite posh though; people always said that when they first opened loads of couples got married there. They were expensive though – everything in Iceland is. That's why my mum moved over here, because she could afford a Happy Meal in Coventry.

No. Screw your gran. If she wants her money back she can come and beg for it.

Probably. He is quite fat these days, isn't he? Iceland sucks, it's not nearly as mystical as everyone thinks. It's just full of suicidal bankers listening to Sigur Ros. The real bitch about this is that I don't think there are any Burger Kings, and there definitely aren't any Domino's Pizzas.
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You got me a Big Mac Meal with a Coke, a Cheeseburger, six Chicken McNuggets and a Happy Meal with a cheeseburger and a Fanta – that came with a Fantastic Mr Fox ice-lolly maker, so that's a bonus. I thought I was enjoying it at first but now I feel really dirty.

Fuck you. OK.

Loads of people believe in pixies and everyone has been over Bjork for ages… I feel horrible, this stuff is gruesome.

It should be ruined for them; I'm pleased that Icelandic kids can't eat this shit any more, they'll be the only fit children on Earth.

We're definitely better than Armenia, but Albania is pretty good. Anyway, we're on the winning team now, you can shove your EU president crap up your arse. I'm not eating any more. Ugh.

