The best thing about living in a port city like Halifax (aside from the excitement that comes with the potential for international drug busts) is that people are always coming and going. When they come, they bring new ideas and bizarre traditions, and when they go, we throw big, boisterous parties. A good friend who came to us from Toronto brought with her my most beloved tradition: The Death Pool. At first glance, you might envision The Death Pool as a festering pit of rotten flesh and decaying bone. But it isn't.In a Death Pool, you bet on which celebrities are going to high-five God in the next year. Everyone pays the pot, and at the end of the year the person with the longest list of dead celebrities takes the dough.I know, I know. What about their families? And what about the fact that you're gambling on people's lives? I've considered these moral objections, and offer the following (hollow, unsatisfying) justifications:1) Famous families have no idea that my friends and I even exist, and if they did, they'd probably just ask for their cut of the money. If Elizabeth Taylor dies this year, I'm sure her family will heave a sigh of relief that sounds suspiciously like "Good riddance." 2) As for the celebrities themselves, I recognize that they are real people, but most of the celebs who make the Death List have arguably been dead for decades anyway. Michael Jackson didn't make our list, mostly because we all agreed that he'd been dead since the video for You Are Not Alone. (It was a Ghost-MJ who dangled his baby off that balcony and molested all those children. That's why he never got convicted! You can't put a ghost in jail!) I hope that quells your moral objections. Now for the rules:
- 5 points for each dead celebrity
- No murder (as in, you do not gain points if you murder someone on your list)
- You can't choose anyone suffering from a terminal illness
- 2Pac and Elvis are already dead
- The person must be an actual celebrity
- Double points if your celebrity commits suicide due to the pressures of fame
- Triple points if two of your celebrities die in the same tragic accident
- If there's a shocking Murder-Suicide of two people on your list (say if Spencer Pratt finally snaps at the realization that his name is an actual synonym for Douchebag (see?) and rage-stabs Heidi Montag before swallowing an entire bottle of Demerol) you win! I highly recommend this sick, twisted passtime to all of you. It will change the way you look at death. When Farrah Faucett died, I could have mourned the passing of an icon, but instead I was all "Damn! I almost chose her!!"AMELIA ALMEIDA
