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Not that the new Sonics team, if it comes into existence, will have anything to do with those guys. Jerry Seinfeld’s old line about how sports fans root for clothes is essentially true—if the Kings moved the 600 miles north to Seattle and put on the old yellow and green jerseys, they’d have different owners, players, coaches, and, in a couple years, a different arena than the Sonics of my youth. The only thing that will be the same is the name and the uniforms—but of course, I don’t care that it’s just laundry. When it comes to my hometown teams, I put blinders on. All I had room for in my head when I first heard the news was, The Sonics could be back soon! The world is more fuzzy and dreamlike and wonderful than I give it credit for!If I take off the blinders, however, the Kings’ potential move to Seattle looks less and less like a bunch of cute puppies dunking a basketball on an adorably-sized hoop under a rainbow while everybody gets blowjobs. As usual in sports, whenever you turn your head to look away from the action on the field/court/pitch, you find yourself surrounded by ugliness.To begin with, Seattle’s gain would be Sacramento’s loss. The Kings have been in that city for 27 years, and if they leave, fans there will be without a major professional franchise. Maybe you could say that Sacramento isn’t a big or important enough town to have an NBA team, or that the people there can always root for the Warriors, but that would be a pretty shitty thing to say to people who are justifiably bummed about losing something they love.
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