This Week in Food Porn: Sandwiches and Smoked Salmon

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This Week in Food Porn: Sandwiches and Smoked Salmon

As another week slides into the dinners and drinks of a winter weekend, why not scroll through some of the most delicious food photographs uploaded to Instagram this week?

"The time has come," the Walrus said, "To talk of many things: Of choux and crisps and oat flapjacks, of cabbages and kings. And why my tea is boiling hot, And whether skate have wings."

As another week slides into the dinners and drinks of a winter weekend, why not warm your cockles with a scroll through some of the most delicious food photographs uploaded to Instagram this week? Bring a bottle, bring a plate. Hell, bring an all-you-can-eat buffet if you like—we'll be here for a while.

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Decorative cabbage Brooklyn style - between the mops and the $.99 soap #urbanforaging #decorativecabbage #wildedibles #decorativeedibles #foraging #forage #forager #forage #purplecabbage #cabbage #brooklyn #newyork #crownheights #bedstuy #bedfordstuyvesant #franklinstreet #ny #nyc

A photo posted by Lisbyk (@ucaneatit) on Dec 1, 2016 at 8:22pm PST

This is precisely how I like to forage for my dinner. Sweating through the urban wilderness to try and find just a morsel, a scrap to keep me running, keep me sharp.

Smørrebrød: (Danish butter and bread open faced sandwiches) Usually made on rye, but I chose a chia variant. Pictures from the top: 1. Potato, rémoulade and caramelised onion 2. Egg yolk, potato, baby cucumber and rosemary 3. Potato, poached egg and caramelised onion 4. Egg, cucumber and pomegranate arils. Served with homemade beet pickles. . . #cleaneating#healthy#beautifulcuisines#hautecusines#foodies#abudhabifood#abudhabifoodies#buzzfeedfood#feedfeed#f52grams#instafoodie#foodglooby#hautecuisines#huffposttaste#bonappetit#sundaytimesfood#food#foodie#instafood#igpicoftheday#foodphoto#foodgawker#foodlovers#foodisfuel#smorrebrod#danish

A photo posted by Shereen (@thefway37_food) on Dec 2, 2016 at 12:17am PST

You call it a smørrebrød, I call it a topless sandwich. You call it an open face sandwich, and I'll call it a topless lunch break. Or a tits-out dinner. My Auntie Steve (sure, deal with it) used to recommend to me that when I finally settled down with a man, it should be with a "fella with a lovely open face." I never quite understood what that meant, but am proud to announce that my current boyfriend does have a face approximately 7 metres wide, so fingers crossed.

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Daydreaming over this dreamy-looking Matcha & Salted Caramel Tart served at @sadaharuaoki patisserie and shared by the lovely team from @thematchasociety. The top pattern reminds us of those green and fluffy looking green tea fields in Japan

A photo posted by Matcha Green Tea Shop (@zenwonders_matcha) on Dec 1, 2016 at 9:41pm PST

If I'm going to get lost in the Hampton Court Maze for 16 hours with nowhere to piss and nothing to read, you better believe that it's going to take more than a slice of green tea cake to cheer me up. Probably a ladder. And a Thermos. And, what the hell, a hand job.

The perfect Friday night nibble with a glass of vino #saltandpeppercalamari created for @in_our_kitchen #crispycalamari #seafood #aussieseafood #foodstyling #foodphotography #foodstagram #instafood #eat: @andremartinphoto styling: @stephsouvlis recipe and food prep: by me

A photo posted by Elle Vernon (@d_elleicious) on Dec 2, 2016 at 12:15am PST

I'd happily eat deep fried dust if it came with enough salt, grease, and a glass of wine on the side. Honestly, just tip the contents of a hoover bag, ashtray, your gym bag, a pillowcase, your coat pockets, and a drainpipe into some batter, add a glass of £3.99 wine and I'm livin' la vida loca.

- Ты знаешь что такое Макдональдс, - спрашивает один пятилетний мальчишка у Богдана. - Нет… - Кааак? А я там был вчера, - гордо заявляет тот, - чизбургер и картошку ел! Бо поворачивается ко мне и задаёт вполне логичный вопрос: - Мам, а что такое Макдональдс? - Это место, где продают всякую бяку и гадость. Я пожала плечами, глядя на женщину. А она одобрительно кивнула. У нас тут Бургеркинг и Макдональдс под боком… Надеюсь туда никогда не попасть с чадом… А вы? Бережёте себя и детей от фастфудов? Для марафона #be_the_blogger задание фудфото "Бургер" Куратор @alesya_novikova Ментор недели @marjoriolesya

A photo posted by Янина (@ioanina_n) on Dec 2, 2016 at 12:15am PST

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Either that's two different people's hands or the model in question had to hang, from a lighting rig, by their toes, to hover a giant carving knife above an innocent veggie burger. Please God, let it be the second.

#instafood #foodporn #foodies #foodpic #foodtagram #gastro #gastronomia #gastroigers #enjoygram #enjoybarcelona #dinner #igersbarcelona #restaurants #bars #bcngourmet #bcn #barcelona #mediterraneanfood #cullinary #hosteleria #ilovemyjob #amoralarte #eatstagram #foodphotography #quiquedacosta

A photo posted by Alain Salamano (@petitprincebcn) on Dec 2, 2016 at 12:13am PST

In the words of our dearly beloved, tragically departed heir to the purple throne Prince, there are 21 positions in a one night stand. And one of them is trying to subtly take one sock off with your other toe, while sliding under the duvet.

Afternoon waffles and ice cream with @sarquek_. Thank you @madcow_icecream for whetting my appetite #yummy #foodporn #tgif

A photo posted by Jonathan Lim (@jonathanlwe) on Dec 1, 2016 at 11:53pm PST

Now this is a game of Trivial Pursuit I can get behind. Give me a purple question Carol, and let's see what I might win.

An idea for your lunch or dinner this weekend: smoked salmon trout. It has a unique and delicate taste. Match it with lemon and cherry tomatoes and you'll have an amazing course. ________________ #smoked #salmontrout #salmon #lemon #cherrytomato #trout #seafood @foodblogfeed #foodblogfeed

A photo posted by Studio Gi - Food Photography (@mr_foodphotography) on Dec 2, 2016 at 12:13am PST

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Eating a large slab of smoked fish off a tea towel is only a few timid steps away from that scene in Trading Places where a very drunk Dan Ackroyd pulls an entire salmon out of his Santa suit and starts munching it, through the greying fibres of his false beard, right there on the bus. Delicious.

#instafood #foodporn #foodies #foodpic #foodtagram #gastro #gastronomia #gastroigers #enjoygram #enjoybarcelona #dinner #igersbarcelona #restaurants #bars #bcngourmet #bcn #barcelona #mediterraneanfood #cullinary #hosteleria #ilovemyjob #amoralarte #eatstagram #foodphotography #quiquedacosta

A photo posted by Alain Salamano (@petitprincebcn) on Dec 2, 2016 at 12:13am PST

Talking of fish, lime a huge fan. (Get it? Lime? As in "I'm?" As in "I am?" Oh forgeddit).

Indulgence at its finest at @petrusrestaurant this #festiveseason ! Check out the Chef's Tasting menu, #Michelin star lunches, maserclasses, the Kitchen Table experience and other #Christmas gift ideas on the @petrusrestaurant website !

A photo posted by Gordon Ramsay (@gordongram) on Nov 30, 2016 at 1:24am PST

And tonight, ladies and gentleman, the creased face carnivore himself, Mr Gordon Ramsay, will be serving up a hard square of lawn trimmings, a single Quaver, a spot of pistachio-flavoured toothpaste, and some figs. Thank you Gordon. Thanks a lot.

Из года в год для меня декабрь как и прежде - месяц предвкушения волшебства. Ребёнок внутри жив, всё ещё трепетно ожидает дня, когда наступает время нарядить ёлку. Радуюсь, что не обросла корой безразличия к этому чудесному празднику. Мы уже решили, где встретим 2017, обговорили главное блюдо на праздничный стол. Скоро на фотографиях еды вырастут еловые леса, важно раскинув свои хвойные лапы на тарелки с вкуснятиной… А пока мы уже зажигаем дома огни и наслаждаемся декабрёмДоброе утро!

A photo posted by Ксения Шикина (@schikkina) on Dec 2, 2016 at 12:12am PST

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Breakfast on Christmas day is, in my experience, like pulling out a single stray eyebrow before ripping your entire bikini line off with a large strip of parcel tape. It's just the beginning, a precursor, a warning of things to come.

Candy caps? Calling all foragers and mycophagists! After a quick sweep of my back yard I turned up 100s of these small orange jobs. I have never harvested candy caps so I would love any input. These fungi exude a milky latex reminiscent of skim milk, smell faintly of maple syrup when held under a lighter for a few seconds, older specimens have hollow stems, texturally they feel grainy, and they easily snap off at the base under any pressure . As far as I know these are the key identifying feature for candy caps. Am I missing anything? Any sage words of advice from those who have collected these? ***(The caps aren't viscid, the mushroom in the back left was under leaky eaves ) #mushroomidentification #mushroomidentificationhelp #fungiidentification #help #fungi #fungus #mushroom #forage #wildfoodlove #candycap #candycaps #candycapmushroom #sweet #nature #pnw #pacificnorthwest #oregon #forager #foragers #mycophagist #mycophile

A photo posted by Rider (@ksbigfoot) on Dec 1, 2016 at 5:11pm PST

I see that deep clean of the cupboard under the sink is going well.

На улице ещё хмуро и темно, а я вам желаю солнца и тепла в душе Цветочки лишними не бывают Chocolate flowers

A photo posted by Polly (@pollykosheleva) on Dec 1, 2016 at 8:55pm PST

I'm not absolutely sure if this is a cake or one of those revolting Royal Dalton figurines virgin aunts keep in their faux mahogany corner cupboards to collect dust, right next to the brass effect carriage clock and ceramic restoration lady on a swing scenes.