THE LEDGER: Kiwis Turn Ice Cold Rivalry Red Hot, Despite Weaker Condoms

For five straight weeks, New Zealand has been the second horse over the line in the two-horse race of the trans-Tasman sporting rivalry.

It's been a bitter streak for the Kiwi sports fans, but hope exists on the horizon. Heavyweight boxer Joseph Parker is on the rise, and the breakup of the ANZ Championship could be a silver lining for New Zealand netball.

Can the Aussies continue their dominance? THE LEDGER investigates.

CRICKET

At this point in the IPL season, it's fair to reflect back and admit that the Kiwis have underperformed in cricket's annual T20 cash bonanza.

Brendon McCullum has been woeful with the bat, while the likes of Kane Williamson, Colin Munro and recent import Martin Guptill haven't made much of an impact either.

McCullum bashed 48 off 27 balls in the Gujarat Lions' victory over the Mumbai Indians last week. It was his best knock in a fair while, but this week has got to go to the Aussies again after continuing fireworks from Dave Warner.

Warner thumped 73 off 56 in Sunrisers Hyderabad's last-ball loss to the Delhi Daredevils.

Again, the Aussies are off the mark early.

WINNER: Australia

FOOTBALL

The curtain has come down on the European domestic football leagues in the last week, leaving only cup competitions to worry about.

Australia's Mile Jedinak captained Crystal Palace in their FA Cup match-up against Manchester United at Wembley.

Sadly for the Socceroo veteran, the Eagles went down 2-1. With no other Kiwis and Aussies involved in anything of note in football circles, that hands the category to Ockers this week.

WINNER: Australia

RUGBY UNION

Easy money here for the Kiwis, with all three New Zealand Super Rugby teams in action notching up victories this weekend.

All three of the wins – the Crusaders over the Waratahs, the Chiefs over the Rebels and the Blues over the Force – were trans-Tasman battles, too.

The Chiefs big win over the Melbourne side takes them to the top of the Super Rugby table, and with three other Kiwi teams likely to make the playoffs this year, well, fair to say the New Zealanders are streets ahead in this category.

WINNER: New Zealand

RUGBY LEAGUE

There's something seriously wrong with the Warriors. New Zealand's only NRL team headed to New Plymouth this weekend to play the Canberra Raiders; a home-coming of sorts for Hawera-raised hooker Issac Luke.

Yet the Warriors flopped, and the Raiders delivered them a 38-12 spanking. The defeat leaves the Warriors floundering in the bottom half of the NRL table, and while they may only be two points adrift of the top eight, there's been little in their recent performances to suggest they're a playoff caliber team this year.

Coach Andrew McFadden will feel the blade, cold on the back of his neck, while underperforming players like Luke, Konrad Hurrell and Manu Vatuvei should be just as worried.

WINNER: Australia

NETBALL

When you first learn of Australia withdrawing from the ANZ Championship due to frustration with a lack of competition from New Zealand teams, you think that's a black mark against the Kiwis.

However, the reality is that two national competitions probably suit each nation better, with a 'Champions League' style cup competition in place to find the best trans-Tasman teams.

The Kiwis have already scored a big broadcast deal for their new comp, which is actually bigger than what Australian netball was able to secure.

For the first time in THE LEDGER history, netball goes the Kiwis' way.

WINNER: New Zealand

MOTORSPORT

The tide is high for Kiwis in motorsport at the moment, with the F1 on its post-Spanish Grand Prix break.

Indycar legend Scott Dixon finished an impressive second in the Grand Prix of Indianapolis over the weekend, setting himself up well for the upcoming Indy 500. Importantly, for THE LEDGER, he beat Australian Will Power in the race – who finished tenth.

Meanwhile, Kiwi Scott McLaughlin took the lead in V8 Supercar Championship after finishing second at Winton over the weekend. The Christchurch lad is now 21 points ahead of Aussie veteran Jamie Whincup, and has 30 more than long-time campaigner Craig Lowndes.

WINNER: New Zealand

BASKETBALL

The Oklahoma City Thunder shocked the NBA with its victory over the Golden State Warriors in Game 1 of the Western Conference finals last week.

Crucial in that victory was the performance of Kiwi Steven Adams, who scored his sixth post-season double double with 16 points and 12 rebounds. The 22-year-old Rotorua lad is shaping as a key member of the Thunder in their attempt to upset the Warriors, who evened up the series 1-1 in San Francisco on Friday.

Aussie Warrior Andrew Bogut is probably more of a favourite to get into the NBA Finals, where he's likely to meet the Cavaliers scrappy Victorian Matthew Dellavedova – but Adams' incredible performances over the last week give the Kiwis the nod this week.

WINNER: New Zealand

OLYMPIC SPORTS: POST-COMPETITION SEX

While the Olympics have been long seen as the ultimate exhibition of humankind's finest athletes, there's no denying that, post-competition, the sex in the athlete's village is rampant.

Expect the Aussies and Kiwis to be right in the mix when it comes to getting sweaty between the sheets at Rio this year.

The Aussies are looking like earlier leaders in this segment of Olympic competition. The Australian Olympic team will be provided with double-strength condoms with antiviral lubricant to protect against the spread of the Zika virus.

Pro-active stuff from the AOC – and enough to secure the win in the Olympic section this week.

WINNER: Australia

WILDCARD SPORT: BOXING

The hype and promotion around Kiwi boxer Joseph Parker is in Tex Ricard territory these days, as New Zealand promoters Duco Events milk the rise of the Southlander through the heavyweight ranks for every dollar and cent.

That's not to say that Parker doesn't have the skills. His points victory over Cameroon's Carlos Takam in the IBF heavyweight title final eliminator in Auckland over the weekend should set him up for a big-money clash with big Brit Anthony Joshua.

Parker is clearly Australasia's biggest boxing draw card these days, handing the Kiwis yet another category this week. It's gonna be a tight finish.

WINNER: New Zealand

OVERALL

NEW ZEALAND 5 AUSTRALIA 4

After a torrid five-week losing streak, the Kiwis have finally emerged as champions in this week's edition of THE LEDGER.

May the Silver Fern fly high. May Tuis and Lion Reds across the nation be cracked open. May Steven Adams keep ballin' in the NBA.

The ice-cold rivalry just got hot again.

BONUS: CLASSIC MOMENT IN AUSSIE-NZ RIVALRY

Shane Bond's yorker to Adam Gilchrist in Adelaide, 2002

While the Black Caps most recent iteration has transformed into one of the world's most exciting one-day teams, New Zealand cricket teams have usually been underdogs when it came to trans-Tasman clashes.

Except when the Kiwis had Shane Bond in their bowling arsenal. 'Bondy' loved bowling against the Australians, capturing three five-wicket hauls and a hat track against the old enemy.

His finest moment arguably came in New Zealand's famed Australia Day demolition of the 'West Islanders' in 2002, which saw Bond nab 5/25 – and humiliate Adam Gilchrist with one of the finest in-swinging yorkers ever bowled. Miss you, Bondy.