Christopher Hanewinckel-USA TODAY Sports
Three Stars of Comedy
The second star: Brody Marleau. That would be Patrick Marleau's nine-year-old son. He got to spend his birthday with the Maple Leafs, which was adorable. He's also apparently working on stealing Mitch Marner's girlfriend, which is somehow more adorable.
The first star: Guy Boucher's face. Fun fact: He's not even reacting to anything in particular here, he's just been making this face constantly since mid-November.
Outrage of the Week
The outrage: That move is disrespectful and anyone who tries it should eat an elbow for their troubles.Is it justified: OK, I'm overselling the outrage here a bit—it's not like anybody went nuclear on Kuznetsov or Forsberg. But that's mainly because their moves didn't work. If either guy had scored, you can bet that plenty of old-school hockey types would have pulled out their soapboxes and pontificated about hot-shot glory boys disrespecting the game and showing up the other side.And here's the thing: It's going to happen. It's kind of amazing that it hasn't happened already.The move has been around for a while; most of us saw it for the first time when Mike Legg scored with it in college back in 1996. But as best we can remember, nobody's ever scored with it in a meaningful NHL game. Kuznetsov may even have been the first player to try it all. That's kind of weird, because it's not like today's players can't do it. Many of them weren't even born yet when Legg pulled it off, and they've grown up trying it; Sidney Crosby did it all the way back in junior. Every NHL team has a few guys who can pull the move off reasonably well in practice. Heck, your beer-league team probably has a few guys who claim they can.
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Obscure Former Player of the Week
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That clears up the semantics, but it doesn't really do the Knights justice. It also leads to weird stuff like that tweet having to include teams from the league's very first season, which hardly makes sense.And if you try to expand the argument to other pro sports, it goes even more off the rails:
You can see what they're trying to do, but I'm pretty sure I wrote essays in college that were shorter than that tweet. And let's be honest, the NBA can say whatever it wants, but the 2002-03 Hornets aren't an expansion team. Nor are teams that join from other leagues, or that show up in 1923 because some railroad tycoon got together six friends and $100 in cash and was granted an NHL team to play out of his backyard.The Golden Knights are an expansion team. And they're the best one ever, in any major sport. It's fine to just say that.
Classic YouTube Clip Breakdown
- We start off with MSG throwing it to a clip from LA. Our host is longtime Kings play-by-play man Nick Nickson, and he's sitting with veteran winger Taylor. They're reminiscing about the very first interview they ever did together, way back in 1977, and Nickson has the clip. This should be fun!
- Hey, wait a minute…
- Yes, our trip back to 1977 has been accomplished via some special effects, a terrible fake mustache, and a fantastic mullet wig. It's actually a pretty decent setup, and I'd be willing to bet that at least a few viewers took a minute to catch on to what was happening.
- In his first answer, Taylor suggests that the Kings should someday switch over the black-and-silver uniforms like the Raiders. Get it? He's predicting what happens in the future. I hope you enjoyed that joke, because it's basically the only one they have for the next four minutes.
- They also trip over which city the Raiders are supposed to be playing in, but they just keep rolling. The bit is good, but not "worth trying more than one take" good.
- Taylor's next answer "predicts" that he should play on a line with Marcel Dionne and Charlie Simmer. That would of course be the Triple Crown Line, which turned out to be one of the best of the 1980s. It was also one of the last great lines to get a decent nickname, instead of today's lazy treatment of taking the first letter of each guy's name and being done with it. We're lucky this line didn't come along today—I'm not sure I could have handled cheering on the STD Line.
- Taylor's next prediction is that the Islanders will be good, at which point Nickson jumps in to wonder if they'll make an important trade someday. That's a reference to the infamous Butch Goring deadline deal with the Kings, but to Nickson and Taylor's credit they don't come right out and hit you over the head with the punchline. Mainly because they're saving that for the next question.
- Yes, we arrive at the inevitable Wayne Gretzky bit. You knew it was coming. Taylor manages to predict all of Gretzky's scoring records, at which point Nickson wonders what would happen if Gretzky ever wound up in a big market like Los Angeles. Taylor responds, "We probably still wouldn't win anything and then end up trading him for Roman Vopat," but I think that part accidentally got cut.
- We mercifully make it to the last question. Nickson wants to know what players do in their spare time. Taylor answers that he likes reading comic books, and as luck would have it happens to be holding one in his hand right then. It's a Batman comic, and Taylor predicts that someday it could make for a good movie, which is funny because… You know what, I think you get the idea.
- I think we can agree that this whole bit isn't exactly the most subtle premise, but there is a neat moment at the very beginning that's easy to miss. Go back to Taylor's first answer at the one-minute mark, and note how he stutters through the first few words. As a real rookie back in 1977, Taylor had a speech impediment, and often avoided doing interviews. He worked on it over the years to the point where it was rarely noticeable, but he sure seems to slip in an intentional reference to it here. I thought that was cool.
- We close with Nickson pointing out the few things "rookie" Taylor failed to predict, and Taylor responding that he wasn't asked about those. They then pull off the "fake laugh and look at the camera" moment that ended each episode of every 1980s sitcom, and we're done.
- In case you're wondering, this YouTube clip doesn't mention the date that it originally aired, but I think we can piece it together. We know it was during Taylor's career but after the Gretzky trade, that it was a game against the Rangers in New York, and that the two teams were tied 1-1 after one period. That leaves two possibilities, one from 1993 and the other from 1990. I think we can safely go with the latter, since the Batman movie came out in 1989. So that means this aired on March 12, 1990, which isn't quite April Fools territory but is close enough. Don’t say you never get any investigative journalism out of this column.
- By the way, Taylor ended up scoring a goal in a Kings' win that night. Who could have predicted that?