Abandon Your Air-Conditioner and Make a Summer Cocktail

The dreaded moment is here: Your air-conditioning unit is staring you in the face like a misanthropic cat.

Sure, it’s the start of summer and it’s time to put that thing in use. It also might be time to take those self-help books and employ them as a balancing system beneath the A/C unit to make sure it doesn’t fall out the window. But why risk it when you could just make yourself a cocktail instead to cool down?

Make the Joy Division cocktail a.s.a.p.

With temperatures rising—thanks, climate change—our hot-as-shit weather forecasts can wait.

Just shake up Death and Company’s Joy Division or a Pink Daiquiri and then read the instructions on how to install that thing in your fifth-floor walk-up.

Bourbon Punch that will give your A/C unit the middle finger.

How is that process looking now? Put the manual down and move on to mixing up this New Orleans-inspired Mary Pickford, or our tropical-inspired punch.

All that’s left to do is to call up Task Rabbit to get someone to install your A/C unit while you cool off with another round and raise a glass to outsourcing.