This morning, American citizens both near and far were delighted to wake up to a video of First Lady Michelle Obama making an appearance on a "Carpool Karaoke" with Late Late Show host James Corden. Jamming heartily to Stevie Wonder, Beyonce, and Missy Elliott—who made a surprise appearance in the back seat—FLOTUS demonstrates that there can still be embarrassing, yet good-natured fun in a world that often seems to be turning to shit.We'd like to imagine that many of history's great (or at least significant) figures would appreciate the release of a quick bout of off-key singing with one's pals. Luckily, the modern era has provided them with a panoply of appropriate songs for basically any situation. Here, we act as their drunk, shouting friends, demanding they pick up the binder and show their true colors on stage.And all the other boys / Try to chaaaaase me / But here's my groundbreaking invention / So call me maybe.Their backup, for when "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" isn't listed in the binder.Sometimes it's easier to deal with men taking credit for the theory of radioactivity than it is to really belt those notes.The conservationist and author of Silent Spring will never be silenced by Prince.More like you're welcome!!!!!!!!!!The only suitable song for the "Iron Lady." Always a crowd-pleaser, unlike Mags herself.I tried to hold you back, but you were stronger. Oh yeah.According to one Oxford historian, the English Reformation was one of the "sickest mic drops in history."As the young president once famously said to a roaring crowd before the Berlin Wall, "Ich bin ein Oasis fan."Despite the rumors of an Alaskan purchase you heard in AP US history, Seward's real folly was never learning anything beyond the chorus.Get this champion of labor rights a drink.Your peculiar love of your mother is all I think about.It is, though, Ivan. It is, though.Of course the Soviet Navy officer who commanded the submarine that prevented nuclear war during the Cuban Missile Crisis would want to relieve his subterranean stress with the Kings of Crunk.Little else besides empires were on his mind.Just a small town carpenter, living in a lonely world. (Extremely lonely.)You're not in trouble deep if you're on birth control!! She'll be here all week.If the world won't listen, this room full of drunk teenagers will.It's like raaaaaain on your copy of "A Modest Proposal." Or was that more like satire?Go home, Judas, you'e drunk.Sorry Tay, no one can shake-shake-shake it off like an infamous seismologist.
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Alexander Graham Bell - "Call Me Maybe"
Lewis and Clark - "Waterfalls"
Marie Curie - "Radioactive"
Rachel Carson - "When Doves Cry"
Ludwig van Beethoven - "Thank You for the Music"
Margaret Thatcher - "Iron Man"
Napoleon Bonaparte - "Waterloo"
Henry VIII - "Losing My Religion"
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