This Week in Food Porn: Carrots, Crockery, and Kim Kardashian's Birthday Cake
Photo via Flickr user carol

FYI.

This story is over 5 years old.

This Week in Food Porn: Carrots, Crockery, and Kim Kardashian's Birthday Cake

This Halloween, dig in to the best of the week's online deliciousness, courtesy of Instagram's finest food porn.
October 31, 2015, 11:00am

Forget ghosts, ghouls, and gout—there's nothing scarier than an empty belly. This Halloween, feast upon the best of the week's online deliciousness, courtesy of Instagram's finest food porn.

Beautiful #colourful #carrots ❤️

A photo posted by The Lucky Taco (@theluckytaconz) on Oct 29, 2015 at 10:48pm PDT

My friend Caspar once cycled to Romania from Oxford, wearing a rucksack. When he finally dismounted, the colour of his testicles was truly something to behold. Still, it's nice to see he's got his stems out again. Good on you, Caspar.

Advertisement

Magnum Interpretation: hazelnut ice-cream, Roquefort crumbles, fig purée, hazelnut sponge. By @pjrollinson #DessertMasters A photo posted by DessertMasters (@dessertmasters) on Oct 29, 2015 at 10:31am PDT

Who doesn't want to live in a time where you can lob the torn-out centre of a loaf of Nimble, scatter it gaily on top of a partially melted choc ice, surround your installation with an avalanche of small leaves, and earn yourself 2,376 likes in the process? What a time to be alive.

#cream #of #pumkin #jogurth #natural #cooking #cookingtime #cookingday #instafood #instafood #foodporn #FoodPhotography #food #healthy #healthyfood #bonappetit #krem #dyniowy #z #jogurtem #naturalnym #gestym #i #pestkami #slonecznika.

A photo posted by Bartek Kwiatkowski (@bartek_basta) on Oct 30, 2015 at 7:18am PDT

A constellation of sunflower seeds on an orb of orange squash may be the most autumnal thing to happen this week. (Since a squirrel tried to eat my handlebar tape, that is.)

Celeriac season! These delicious celeriac noodles are the perfect sauce-sopping alternative to refined pasta or spaghetti. Made in a flash with the #HemsleySpiralizer Celeriac is one of our favourite low-starch veggies, full of vitamins A, C, K and E. Which is an anagram for CAKE. What's not to love?! Purchase the #HemsleySpiralizer from the link in our bio for UK, @goop for US and @theofficialselfridges for the rest of the world. #TheArtOfEatingWell #Spiralizer #Spiralizing #VegetableNoodles #Zoodles (Photo by @ellievdunbar) A photo posted by Hemsley Sisters (@hemsleyhemsley) on Oct 28, 2015 at 11:16am PDT

Advertisement

You know those people who look really amazing in photos but, that one time you met them in a bar, turned out to have actually shaved their jawline onto a double chin and were wearing those shoes that do up with a toggle rather than laces? "Celeriac bolognese" is precisely what I'll be calling those men from now on.

Pumpkin #shelfie

A photo posted by Nigella (@nigellalawson) on Oct 30, 2015 at 7:00am PDT

Of course we're going to love the shelves of a woman who looks upholstered, rather than dressed. But my God, we never knew we had it so good.

Sorting saffron at Mas Pons. This saffron is then toasted and sold, and it's the most fragrant and intense I've ever smelled #harvest #saffron #spain A photo posted by Rosie Birkett (@rosiefoodie) on Oct 27, 2015 at 10:34am PDT

Temping is a great life, isn't it? The franking machine, the box files, all those nice Post-it note. Who wouldn't want to spend their days answering info@ emails and ordering printer cartridges? It's not like you could otherwise get a job sitting in the late autumnal sun, sorting through beautiful purple flowers… Oh. Oh.

Looks good enought to eat….but not just yet #olives #olive #harvest #spain #food #foodie #yum #nomnom

A photo posted by Belazu Ingredient Co. (@belazu_co) on Oct 26, 2015 at 10:06am PDT

When the olives grow like grapes and the Instagram servers whirr like jet engines.

#fermenting in Autumn A photo posted by Rawduck Hackney (@raw_duck) on Oct 26, 2015 at 8:06am PDT

Advertisement

Sometimes, the line between pickled gastronomic heaven and the basement of the Wellcome Collection is thinner than others. But it's always there. Believe me. It's always there.

Second serving DOWN! #lasagneday is turning out to be quite the epic feast. #sundayisfunday #stuffed #allyoucaneat #pigwithoutjudgement

A photo posted by LONZO London (@lonzolondon_) on Oct 25, 2015 at 8:33am PDT

I once took my mother's entire collection of Willow pattern crockery to school in a bin bag, to "play Victorians" with my friend Catherine. Three hours later, I brought home a bin bag full of blue and white ceramic shards, a wig that looked like a cottage loaf, and a lifetime of remorse.

My husband never ceases the amaze me! He rented out the entire movie theater to screen the new Steve Jobs (It's sooooo good BTW) and had all of my family & close friends come dressed up as their best pregnant Kim look (fake baby bumps provided on arrival!) Not sure if that was to make me feel less huge or just a fun cool theme but I loved it & had the best time ever, feeling so very comfortable eating churros with a bunch of pregnant women! Just what I needed, the perfect chill yummy food birthday!!!! A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on Oct 21, 2015 at 8:57pm PDT

This is what I take folic acid for. Sure. I mean, sure. Absolutely. Yup. On ya. Right behind you. Same. I get it. Yuh huh. Great.