And Now the Olympic Village Is On Fire

July 29, 2016, 5:15pm

There has been a small fire in the basement of the team building in the Olympic Village. All athletes and staff were evacuated and are fine
— AUS Olympic Team (@AUSOlympicTeam) July 29, 2016

As if the run-up to the Rio Olympics couldn’t get any worse. There are reports of shit in the water, people have tried to extinguish the Olympic flame on its way to the Games, more than half of the Olympic Village was reported to be incomplete, the Australian team reported abhorrent conditions for their living space, and now (now!) the Olympic Village caught fire. The Games are a week away, people.

(It had to be done.)

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And guess who reported the fire? Why, the Australians, yet again sounding an alarm. While there was some kind of developing world vs. developed world “oh no, my bathroom is missing a tile” boo-hoo tension earlier, a fire just about does it as far as legitimate concerns go, no matter where you’re from.

The cause of the fire is unknown and we have just been let back into the building
— AUS Olympic Team (@AUSOlympicTeam) July 29, 2016

The fire brigade were quickly on the scene and the AOC’s emergency management plan was put in place pic.twitter.com/NY0a0swduc
— AUS Olympic Team (@AUSOlympicTeam) July 29, 2016

All athletes were safely evacuated and are now back in the building pic.twitter.com/d5P8APqgZK
— AUS Olympic Team (@AUSOlympicTeam) July 29, 2016

The Olympic team’s social media account says that the fire was small, and that all of the athletes were evacuated and are fine, but this adds a whole new dimension to the disrepair. There’s a big difference between making sure that your floor isn’t dirty and making sure it isn’t on fire. On the bright side, at least there’s plenty of shit-tainted water available in case of future fires.