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Cry-Baby of the Week

This week: A woman who's sad because she can't get her face burned off versus people who hate children.

It's time to judge two delicate little snowflakes again!

Cry-Baby #1: A police officer and a judge in Richmond, VA

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The incident: A child drew on some rocks in a park with chalk.

The appropriate reaction: Smiling. If you're extra-friendly, maybe going up to the kid and complimenting them on their drawings before skipping away.

The actual reaction: The child's mother, 29-year-old Susan Mortensen, was charged with vandalism. The case made it to court where, instead of being thrown out, she was ordered by a judge to serve 50 hours of community service.

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Police and park officials say that Susan was charged as "chalk is the same as graffiti". Wait, what?! No it's not.

Stacy Rogers, the officer who charged Susan, claims that she had an "attitude problem" and used "curse words" after he confronted her over the "vandalism". Which I assume is probably the actual issue here. I'm not a lawyer, but I'm fairly certain having an attitude problem and swearing are both totally, totally legal.

Cry-Baby #2: Anna Inglis

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The incident: A woman was turned away from a beauty salon because she was black.

The appropriate reaction: Er, what? That's a fucking disgrace. Surely? What possible legitimate and non-racist reason could there be to do something like that?

The actual reaction: I know you're probably thinking, "We should be protesting that place!" but hear me out. According to the article, Annie (the lady in the photo above), went to the Treatment Rooms in Bristol to try to get laser hair removal, where she was turned away. According to Lucy Meadows, the manager of the Treatment Rooms, this was because:

"Our laser machine does not treat Afro-Caribbean skin, just as it cannot treat the skin of people who are on certain medications or have certain health problems. The safety of our clients’ skin is paramount and we would not offer a treatment that isn’t suitable."

Which is information that was backed up by Habia which, in addition to sounding a lot like "labia" (LOL!), is some kind of regulatory board for the health and beauty industry.

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So, really, Anna should have been happy that she didn't get her skin melted off by a machine that isn't suitable to be used on her. Instead, she contacted the papers, posed for that sad, little photo above, and gave an interview in which she said her visit was "humiliating and upsetting". I can see that it would have been annoying that the salon didn't have suitable machinery for her. But crying racism is the kind of thing that can ruin a business, and should be used very, very sparingly.

So, who is the biggest cry-baby? Please, please, please let us know in the poll below so that we can shame one of these self-serious pussies forever:

Who is the bigger cry-baby?

Previously: Man-Child Crying Rapper vs. Curse-Word Hating Stepmother

Winner: Man-Child Crying Rapper! (Obvz.)

Follow Jamie on Twitter: @JLCT