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Vice Blog

LONDON - PIRATE PRINCE HARRY

Our friend Bob somehow ended up at a fancy dress party in Hampshire dressed as a chicken last weekend and came across some unexpected guests. Here's what he had to say on the matter.

"I went to this pretty posh party in Hampshire last weekend that I probably didn't deserve to be at given my poor breeding, poor social skills and actual poorness. Prince Harry was there with his girlfriend. He had the shittest pirate costume (shitter than my substandard chicken costume - I was the cheapest looking of three chickens at the party) and he really just looked like a slightly chubby toff. Any time he came into earshot I could hear him waffling on about rugby, and he seemed quite dense. His girlfriend, on the other hand, is way hotter in real life than in photos, but she looked totally dead behind the eyes. She kept shouting at Harry that she wanted to dance but he wasn't interested so she danced on her own. Will I get sued if I say she looked like maybe she'd been (possibly) doing coke? (Not that I am saying she ever would do such a thing.)"