Disappointed Thief Appears to Dump Non-Alcoholic Wine Haul on Side of Road

Gutted.
May 25, 2018, 4:17pm
Photo via Flickr user Jeff Kubina.

There’s nothing like going to the trouble of stealing a huge amount of alcohol, only to find that it’s non-alcoholic. You know: your mate’s on board, he’s bringing his uncle’s van, this should be a walk in the park. You’ve even bought snacks—it’s going to be fun! Sure, there’s a small risk of imprisonment, but it’s certainly worth it for a nice big van full of that expensive, definitely alcoholic, wine.

Unless, of course, you end up stealing loads of worthless grape juice that you thought was wine.

This could be the explanation for the hundreds of bottles of non-alcoholic booze dumped by the side of a road in the south of England last week. As reported by local news website KentLive, around 25 plastic bin bags of non-alcoholic Spanish wine Castillo De Salobrena were found abandoned on the side of a road in Thanet, Kent, with no clear explanation.

Authorities have been led to believe that the abandoned bottles may be the result of an anticlimactic robbery. Local councillor, Suzanne Brimm, whose brother discovered the bottles, speculated as to whether the robbery had come from a warehouse. Cllr Brim told the website: "Somebody has obviously got hold of them and dumped them when they realised they are non-alcoholic and of no particular value.”

“It could have come from a warehouse as there is so much of it,” she continued. “Why would you steal stuff and put it in carrier bags?"

Another theory to explain the bizarre dump could be that the wine had been stolen from a local pub. Indeed, at the time of this mysterious incident, two pubs in the area had reportedly had their stocks robbed. However, Cllr Brimm did not believe the two were related, and no other robberies matching this description have been reported in the area.

Another explanation is that perhaps someone made a bulk wine order from Waitrose, and was so deeply embarrassed by their mistake, decided to get rid of the evidence rather than suffer through 800 glasses of non-alcoholic booze.

The mystery continues.