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NFL Dos and Don'ts: Chicago Bears

The Chicago Bears were not a good football team. Thank God for Jay Cutler.

As we prepare for another year of NFL football, let's take a look back at the highs and lows from 2014 for each team. Welcome to NFL Dos and Don'ts. If you missed one, you can read all our recaps right here.

Do

One thing I've learned doing these Dos and Don'ts is that there were a lot of bad football teams out there last year. The Chicago Bears were one of them. Unlike many of those bad teams, the Chicago Bears have Jay Cutler. Now, maybe you're the sort of person who doesn't like Jay Cutler—that's fine, and even understandable. He's a surly, aloof guy with a rocket arm that makes you expect the world. When he doesn't deliver, all those things conspire against him and it's very easy to get down on him. I get it.

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Counterpoint:

I fucking love this guy. There is an entire meme about him not caring about anything; this is how all athletes should be. Just do your thing, man, and don't pay any attention to us mouthbreathers down here yelling at you. Life's too short to spend your time worrying about what Joe Stromboli down at Pulaski's thinks about you.

Actually, it's refreshing to see an athlete not buy into this media fantasy that we are all entitled to an explanation for every single face or gesture you make on the field. Or that every single thing you do is layered with meaning. No one's asking Chris Berman, "You got a little guttural out there talking about the Raiders, what were you thinking then?" No one's breathing over my shoulder and asking me, "So can you talk about your decision to write glowingly about Jay Cutler?"

You've got an awesome job that pays a ridiculous salary and what I'm sure is a very lovely family. "Don't Caaaaaaaaaaaare" should absolutely be your default position. Which brings us to our Do, and it belongs to dear, sweet Jay.

Rule No. 1 as an NFL quarterback is throw touchdowns as often as possible. Somewhere around Rule No. 5 is don't take a sack if you don't have to. Jay's a smart guy and knows taking a sack is bad—especially in this situation, which was a third-down play in field-goal range in the waning seconds of the half with no timeouts left. So he did not take a sack, and Chicago got three points. Do keep scoring opportunities alive, and, most important, if you ever get an opportunity to throw a football at a referee's testicles, you Do it.

Don't

@Ky1eLong why are you worried about who is following you on twitter? More important shit is happening in my world than Kyle Long's tweets
— Martellus Bennett (@MartysaurusRex) January 13, 2015

@Ky1eLong I don't need this form of social currency maybe you do. If a follow from me is going to make you feel wealthier socially, then
— Martellus Bennett (@MartysaurusRex) January 13, 2015

I mean, come on guys. Even if you're just screwing around with each other, Don't do this. As a fan and a person who gets paid to write about the dumb things in sports, I love athletes on Twitter. It's the best. Some boring-ass August afternoon becomes a delight because some idiot tweets a picture of himself with a bong in the background and we're off to the races. Which is precisely why I would never in a million years have any social media presence if I were an athlete, especially a young one. Look at how dumb this is. Utterly meaningless and yet we, and every other website on the planet, wrote it up exactly because it was so stupid.