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The Writing-Cute-Things... Issue

vice Presents The People's Lists

GETTING OUT OF BED ON THE "RIGHT" SIDETo arise from the left side of the bed will put you in a sour mood and will subject your entire day to misfortune. Get up from the right side and step first on your right foot

Excerpted from The People’s Almanac by David Wallechinsky and Irving Wallace

Illustrations by Laura Park

GETTING OUT OF BED ON THE “RIGHT” SIDE

To arise from the left side of the bed will put you in a sour mood and will subject your entire day to misfortune. Get up from the right side and step first on your right foot. If you err, walk backward until you have returned to bed and can begin again.

Origin:

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The Romans thought the left side to be the “evil one.” A citizen entered a friend’s home with his right foot forward. Some wealthy families even hired a “footman” to insure proper entry of all guests. The English word “sinister” (meaning “wicked or evil”) is derived from the Latin word meaning “left side.”

BREAKING A MIRROR

This will bring you seven years of bad luck or might cause the death of someone in the family. If a mirror is broken, remove it from the house and, if possible, bury it in the ground (to counteract the evil consequences).

Origin:

Before the invention of mirrors, man gazed at his reflection, his “other self,” in pools, ponds, and lakes. If the image was distorted, it was a mark of impending disaster. The “unbreakable” metal mirrors of the early Egyptians and Greeks were valued items because of their magic properties. After glass mirrors were introduced, it was the Romans who tagged the broken mirror a sign of bad luck. The length of the prescribed misfortune, seven years, came from the Roman belief that man’s body was physically rejuvenated every seven years, when he became, in effect, a new man.

ENCOUNTERING A BLACK CAT

Avoid black cats. If one crosses your route, return home.

Origin:

The Egyptians worshipped the cat and punished anyone who dared to kill one. In the Middle Ages, however, the black cat was linked to witches and Satan. Since it was believed that a witch had the power to transform herself into a cat, it was thought likely that a cat who crossed one’s path was a witch in disguise.

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SNEEZING

If you are in the presence of someone who sneezes, protect him from danger by saying “God bless you” or “

Gesundheit

.” Other acceptable blessings are “Long may you live” and “May you enjoy good health.”

Origin:

Ancient man believed that his breath was also his soul or “essence of life.” When God made man, he “breathed into his nostrils the breath of life.” A rapid departure of that breath—a sneeze—is the same as expelling life from one’s body. Also, it leaves a vacuum in the head that evil spirits can enter. Roman citizens feared sneezing when a plague hit their city during the reign of Pope Gregory the Great. Since they regarded the sneeze as a sure sign of approaching sickness, Pope Gregory instituted the use of the phrase “God bless you” to shield sneezers from any ill effects.

OPENING UMBRELLAS INDOORS

Umbrellas are to be used only outdoors. Failure to adhere to this dictate will bring about the “righteous anger of the sun.”

Origin:

Umbrellas were used in the East as early as the 11th century BC. Members of the political and religious elite used them not only as protective measures against hot sun rays but also as devices to ward off any spirits who might do them harm. Because of the umbrella’s sacred relationship to the sun, it is wrong to open it in the shade.

WALKING UNDER LADDERS

If you walk under a ladder, the wrath of the gods will be upon you. Should you forget and do so, quickly cross your fingers or make a wish.

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Origin:

A ladder leaning against a wall forms a triangle with the wall and the ground. This triangle signifies the Holy Trinity, and to enter into the sacred enclosed area is a punishable offense. Also, crossing through this forbidden zone may weaken the powers of the gods and unleash the powers of evil spirits.

SPILLING SALT

If you fall victim to this dilemma, simply take a pinch of salt and toss it over your left shoulder, “right into the Devil’s face.”

Origin:

Salt was once a rare and costly commodity. As such, it was economic waste to spill any. Also, salt is a purifier, a preservative, and symbolizes the good and lasting qualities of life. It was mixed into the foods used in the religious ceremonies of both the Greeks and the Romans. One source of this superstition is Leonardo da Vinci’s painting of the Last Supper—the betrayer Judas has accidentally spilled salt onto the table.