Newly installed traffic signs in Boulder, Colorado, reminding drivers to employ safe driving practices are proving to be about as dangerous as all of the stuff they warn against. That’s for a couple of reasons: one, neither the city of Boulder nor the state of Colorado put those signs there, and two, they contain harsh language that’s not only distracting drivers as they pass but compelling many to take pictures of the signs behind the wheel.
The signs, posted in a handful of locations around Boulder, urge drivers to do simple lifesaving stuff like obey speed limits or not look at their phones while driving. The problem is, the one reminding you not to look at your phone while you drive reads “Get Off Your Damn Phone.”
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There’s another one that puts a new twist on an old-school favorite street sign. Instead of “SLOW Children At Play” or some such reminder to watch out for kids while you drive, the offending sign says, “Don’t Kill Any Kids Today.”
Another simply reads, “Slow The Fuck Down.” Colorado has been awfully profane lately.
Boulder police are investigating the traffic signs as criminal tampering. They currently don’t know who put them up or when they did it but they at least acknowledge that the signs are well-intentioned.
As Boulder police commander Darren Fladung told Denver’s 9News, “I appreciate the fact that it’s drawing attention to the fact that we’d like people to slow down and not be on their phones, but there’s probably, again, a few more appropriate ways about getting that message out.”
Fladung may not know who’s responsible for the traffic signs but he has his suspicions. He thinks they were put there by a concerned citizen frustrated by the bad driving habits of their fellow, uh, Bouldarians(?). No, Google says people from Boulder are called “Boulderites.” I don’t like that. Bouldarians is better.
The signs that have enraptured Bouldarians have been removed by the Transportation Department, though it’s currently unclear if they’ve located all of the signs. In the meantime, Bouldarians will have to keep their eyes peeled for more rude but true traffic signs.