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Vice Blog

CANADA - THE BUCKING WORLD OF SARA CARLSON

I didn't think anything on YouTube was going to blow my mind more wide open than it already was 'til I discovered the icky but mesmerizing sex goddess that is Sara Carlson. And I don't pretend to know much about dance but really, do you need to be an expert to know that Carlson--who doesn't seem to ever wears pants--has inimitable moves? No, you don't. Please, follow me on a short guided tour through the bucking and gyrating world of Sara Carlson.

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One of my favorite things about this video, besides oh everything about it, is that when Carlson's backup dancers are spinning on their heads or doing the crabwalk, Sara will just do the moonwalk. Right out of the frame. Then SURPRISE! She comes right back! I also like imagining the conversation between the choreographer (perfect Italian choreographer name: Tony Ventura) and the scuttling breakdancer.

"I could do a scuttle."
" 'Scuzi?"
"Ehhh, I could do a scuttle? I was famous for it in elementary school. I used to do it everywhere. Up the stairs. Across the football field."
"You must be a wonderful scuttler! Well, as sure as my name is Tony Ventura, this video will be the one for which I am remembered!"

Here's a great video of violinist Stefan Grappelli playing while Sara skips around a chair in her underwear. You'll have to wait about 40 seconds before she trots in, but that trot! It proves she was a very pretty Shetland pony in her previous life. I'm not entirely convinced that these two are actually in the same room together, but who cares? I'd like to direct your eyes to this glorious screengrab, which I actually pulled pretty randomly.

The "Cowgirl Dance" is another one of my favorites. Once Carlson is up on the saddle, looking like she's trying to rub one off, you're glued in. She kicks her legs out in all directions, then pinches them back in. Here she is smacking one of her dancers across the face. Yeah, get him! He's such a stupid jerk candy-striper cowboy dancer.

For more Sara videos, check out her MySpace page. It's just mental that she only has 33 friends.

JO SNYDER