JG Ballard was right. Fucking cars is a total turn-on. Believe me, once you've had Pontiac you don't go back. In my techno-dreams, I imagine myself copulating with many of the other beautiful things I own, in a sort of cyborg, human/machine love-interface basis, a bit like early Numan. In fact, this is how I would like to make love to a series of my favourite technological appliances.BlackberryWe'd go to a fashionable nightclub. There'd be champagne and skinny, vapid girls who have potential to carve out a modest career in off-runway modelling. We'd dance all night to a Boyz Noize DJ set. Light and music would dazzle, swirling to a giddying climax. When the moment was right, I'd slip my tongue down its keypad.
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