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Vice Blog

LONDON - A LONG ARGUMENT WITH A SCIENTOLOGIST ON AIM


I'm used to my friends making bad decisions. Bad decisions about sex, about money, about family, about jobs, about gambling, about who to leave their pets with while they go away to ATP, about trousers, about whether it's a good idea to call your guy again even though it's only 6:45 and no one is enjoying themselves, they're just sitting out the night hoping to get laid once people start to pass out. But I've never had a friend make a bad decision about religion, until yesterday, when I was meant to be editing, writing, or making the intern taste pee and a friend told me she'd become a Scientologist on instant messenger (I don't think you convert that way). Here's the conversation.

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She's in pink and I'm in blue, because she's a girl an I'm a boy.

And so on into infinity. I'd never met a Scientologist before and unfortunatley I soon realized that I knew nothing about it and my opinions were all entirely based on not wanting Tom Cruise's Martian lice breeding in my asshole, so I couldn't help her.

ALEX GEORGE