Life

Amazon’s ‘Wife Guy’ Reviewers Aren’t Helpful, But They’re Cute

Romance isn’t dead, if you know where to look.
amazon reviews wife guys

Products on Amazon live and die by their reviews. How the hell else are you going to know if “HIMOON Bed Pillows for Sleeping 2 Pack” is any better than “SEMZSOM Bed Pillows for Sleeping Standard Size, Set of 2?” Some reviews are more helpful than others, but one recurring theme repeatedly stands out in my shopping journeys: reviews written by wife guys. 

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Among a surprising variety of products, from casual jackets to humidifiers, there are men who write reviews shaped entirely by their wife’s experience with a product. “Wife likes it and uses it everyday after shower,” wrote a user named Abe Z in 2017 on a listing for a hairdryer. “She is doing it right now. God I love this woman!” In 2020, someone named Fred D reviewed the same product by saying, “Bought this for my wife as a replacement for the broken one. She loves it and that is all that matters to me! Lots of power.” 

These are Amazon’s wife guys, men whose identity is founded primarily upon having a wife. Generally, it’s a term that often comes with some baggage or critique, as though a wife guy is using his partner for clout. Ned Fulmer of the Try Guys is a classic example: He built a persona in part around how much he loved his wife, then had a very public cheating scandal. But the term can also connote a man who makes his relationship with his wife his personality in a more endearing way. And frankly, it’s just nice to see a couple that enjoys talking about each other, even on a website not quite designed for it. These guys aren’t going to become famous for their reviews—they’re just using the platform as yet another avenue to tell the world that they love their wives. 

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Sometimes, the wife guy uses his review to compliment his wife, emphasizing how sexy he finds her. He might mention buying the item as a gift—and often, these products ultimately benefit him, too, like lingerie or a sex toy. This lace bodysuit, for example, is filled with reviews from guys eager to state that they get to sleep with their wives. “Boomshakalaka,” one is titled. “Looks amazing on...or OFF!! Got this for my wife.....WOW!!!🔥🔥🔥👉👌💥,” says another. Will these guys’ wives ever actually see the reviews? Who knows. The wife guy wants to share his message, anyway. 

“Looks amazing on…or OFF!! Got this for my wife…..WOW!!!🔥🔥🔥👉👌💥”

The trend covers far more innocent items, too. A listing for a pair of women’s joggers contains dozens of reviews from guys rather plainly saying that their wife loves them. They’re not even being particularly helpful. “My wife has been satisfied with these pants,” wrote Robert Smith. “She wears them around the house as her ‘comfy clothes’ on her lazy days.” Several others say only “my wife loves them” and nothing more. Frequently, the wife guy review hinges only on the simple perception that the wife has enjoyed the product, but not what exactly she enjoys about it. What is the material like? Is the stitching secure? Are the pockets functional? Ultimately, it’s not about reviewing the product at all. It’s just about the wife guy being a wife guy. 

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The Weirdest Stuff You Can Buy on Amazon

Occasionally, though, one finds a wife guy review that really shows the potential of the craft. Reviewing a pair of rain boots, one man shared this story: “I was skeptical in buying these, not exactly sure what I would get. The day after they arrived, it rained cats and dogs. So, my wife had an immediate chance to try them out and LOVED them. She texted me later that afternoon and said she’d been walking around in them all day, and it felt like ‘walking on a cloud’—her words! I got her a black pair, and now I’m waiting for her brown pair to arrive ’cause a lady still needs to accessorize. :)”

Let other reviewers worry about a product’s actual traits; on a platform of overwhelming excess, the wife guy raises questions that feel far more human. What sort of dynamic does this couple have that he is responsible for buying his wife’s rain boots? Why are any of these guys buying products that people would presumably want to purchase for themselves? Are these men choosing their wife’s outfits? And at the end of the day, what is it driving them to review the item at all?

Perhaps the wife guy feels compelled to review every item he purchases on Amazon, as the site encourages. Perhaps the item was purchased using his Amazon account, and the wife has told him to leave a review because she was indeed pleased with the product but didn’t have the purchase linked to an account of her own. Or maybe, it’s all because these wife guys really do just love their wives. They love them so much that they not only buy them this stuff but take the time to consider their love further in a brief Amazon review. 

A desire for fame may drive some wife guys, but some do truly seem driven by a pure desire to think of their wives nearly constantly. Because the wife guy Amazon review serves no other purpose. Times are tough, and relationships are hard. So even if the review offers nothing for the consumer, they remain a sweet little reminder that love is out there. The Amazon wife guy’s reviews are about his wife because the rest of his world is, too.