That North Korean football team just can’t catch a break. First they were caught outsourcing their hooligan needs to China, by paying actors to fill their country’s section in the stands. Then the team was poisoned by those nasty South Koreas — and right before the World Cup qualifier too! Now, after returning home empty-handed, their Dear Leader Kim Jong-il took a full six hours to publicly shame and reprimand the team for losing the Cup. The team’s coach, Kim Jong-hun, got the brunt of Dear Leader’s fury; Kim Jong-il saw the coaches failure as a “personal betrayal.” In addition to being booted from the Workers’ Party of Korea, Jong-hun will spend the rest of his life working as a builder. It could be worse, though: back in the good old days, athletes were sent to prison camps for performing poorly.For more on this powerful and prosperous nation, watch the Vice Guide to North Korea.
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