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This German shepherd—the world’s richest dog—inherited his money from his father, who was left $80 million in 1991 by his owner, German countess Karlotta Liebenstein. The other $300 million came from money his trustees made in investments. Yeah, he has people who work for him. He also owns Madonna’s old Miami mansion. How many of you are wondering if you can marry a dog?Toby Rimes: Worth $80 million
The rich keep getting richer. Toby’s great-great-great-dogfather, the original Toby, was the pampered poodle of crazy rich lady Ella Wendel, who left him all her money when she died in 1931. The endowment, passed from dog to dog ever since, has been growing as your chances of getting a job dwindle.Luke, Layla, Sunny, Lauren, and Sadie: Worth $30 million
Oprah Winfrey won’t even give us one of her favorite things, but her will reportedly provides a fortune for whatever dogs she leaves behind when she dies. That is, if Oprah is not immortal, which I find hard to believe.
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Rags-to-riches stories do come true, but only if you’re a stray that wanders into Italian real estate scion Maria Assunta’s house where you purr your way into the will. But you’re a human. You’ll get arrested if you try that. You’re screwed.Conchita, April Maria, and Lucia: Worth $11 Million
These three yipping pooches (a Chihuahua, a Maltese, and a Yorkshire terrier) got a $3 million trust and a Miami mansion (which just sold for more than $8 million) from crazy rich lady Gail Posner. Her own son only got $1 million and contested the will, alleging that her aides drugged her with pain pills and tried to steal her money. Florida!Gigoo: Worth $10 million
British publishing heir Miles Blackwell made a fortune selling textbooks. Then he left it all to a chicken. There is a rich chicken out there in the world. Open a vein now.Bring a box of tissues and read more from our Hopelessness Issue:The Secret Drinker’s HandbookDon’t Get CaughtThe Right to Die Is the Right to Live
