LONDON – SADDAM HUSSEIN’S FRIED CHICKEN

Saddam Hussein, despite being almost two years dead to the day, has entered the world of celebrity endorsement.

In a market already pretty crowded (what with live TV pisshead and pregnant smoker Kerry Katona advocating family fun in Iceland and Johnny Rotten owning the butter market), the former Iraqi dictator has found his niche in high street fried chicken.

Their motto is: “Saddam loved a challenge—and eating our spicy wings needs the same courage.”

Forget your Dixie/Dallas/Maryland/Morden Fried Chicken; customers at HFC in Shenyang, China (aka Passion Barbecue Chicken Wings) will need the courage of a war criminal to handle their spicy delights.

Saddam’s secret recipe of nonexistent herbs and spices is reportedly hidden in the basement of a primary school in Basra.

As a side note—and closer to home—Wikipedia offers a helpful analysis of our local greasemongers for any hungry racists looking to get their hands on some fried fowl:

“Many British chicken outlets serve Halal meat and use a more spicy batter formula to differentiate themselves from KFC and appeal to young Muslim customers. Some have also diversified to sell Kebab, Pizza and Fish and Chips. Especially popular in poor and ethnic minority neighbourhoods, fried chicken restaurants have been criticised for contributing to urban blight”.

You’ve got to love Wikipedia racists.

TIM CHESTER