A Glossary of Sex Worker Terminology

This story is originally from VICE New Zealand.

If you’re considering treating yourself to one night in paradise for the first time, you might be baffled by the seemingly random list of potential “act” listed on escort agency websites and brothel flyers.

Like any office jargon, the “world's oldest profession” has a language of its own – one that can be confusing to the wide, bambi eyes of a first-time client.

Seeing Greek on offer may conjure an image of seafood and souvlaki. Multi-shots seem like they could get violent. And a Girlfriend Experience will only disappoint if you think you’ll be walking out of your 2 hour booking with a permanent partner on your arm. Unfortunately, a Brown Shower is exactly what you think it is. 

With the help of a few sex worker friends, we’ve put together a cheat-sheet to all things naughty and nice*, to clue you in if you’re a paid-for-sex newbie. A lot of this stuff is global, but this list is based off of conversations with people in the industry based in Aotearoa / New Zealand — so definitely double check.

Some blanket rules: this shit is all paid for, always with condoms and discussion ahead of time is a plus for all parties involved. 

*No glossary of this ilk can ever be perfect. Different terminology is used by different places and individuals, so take it all with a grain of salt and, in the words of one local sex worker, “what flies in one establishment might go down like a common whore in another”. 

Agency - An agency requires clients to pre-arrange bookings. No walk-ins or desperate calls at 3am. While many agencies have their own locations, some only offer out-calls. They’ll have a website where you can check out the ladies, but you won’t always get to see their faces until you’re there in person. 

Brothel - In a traditional brothel you can walk in, see who’s free and the fun begins shortly thereafter. The ladies work in shifts and wait at the brothel for you to choose from who’s available. They often have a bar/lounge too.

Strip club - An often paid-entry establishment, similar to a normal bar…. Except dancers will be shimmying up and down poles and shaking their asses a few metres ahead of you. Don’t touch the dancers. And don’t be a stingy MF - tip. Some strip clubs do have brothel style rooms available - but ask the staff discreetly, not the dancers themselves. 

SOOB - Small Owner Operated Brothel or self operated brothel. In New Zealand, these are establishments that don't require a brothel licence as they’re privately shared by 4 women or less.

Client - That’s you. Also known in the US as a John or a ‘trick’. Although many people have gone off the term John for clients.

Dommes - Also known as a female dominatrix. Dommes provide a tailored BDSM-based service, where you are their submissive. 

Escort - A paid-for companion. An escort can be hired to join you for dinner or a party. Not all escorts are prostitutes, so double check if you want sex to be on the cards. 

Lady - A prostitute. But you’ll often hear Madams and agencies refer to their staff as the ladies to make it all feel a bit classier.

Madam - Traditionally, a female brothel manager. 

Prostitute - Simply a person you pay for sex. There’s a bit of a culture war around the language used, but you’ll find many working girls in Aotearoa refer to themselves this way irl. 

Sex Worker - A term that encapsulates all jobs in the field of providing sexual services or sex industry. Sex workers can be prostitutes, escorts, porn performers, online content producers, live-streamers etc.  

Couples - You and another are the ones coming in as a couple to see one prostitute. 

Bi-doubles - A booking with 2 prostitutes. They’ll get dirty with each other as well as with you. 

Dinner dates - the client pays to take the lady to dinner, and pays the bill. 

Outcalls - a booking that doesn’t take place on location at the agency/brothel. Outcalls are predominantly to homes and hotels. 

Overnights - A booking that includes an overnight stay. Usually this includes an "allocated amount of sleeping time”, but not all agencies/brothels have this rule. 

Travel companion - An escort hired to go with the client on a trip. This usually means a weekend or week away in another city and sometimes international travel. 

Party bookings - Hiring a group of escorts for an event, such as a birthday. These are multiple hour bookings and sex isn’t always on, but partying is. Some escorts are open to drinking and taking drugs with the clients.

Anal play - Pretty self explanatory. Rimming and rubbing are in, but anal play does NOT include anal sex. Some escorts are okay with finger penetration for anal play, so ask first. 

BDSM - A 4 letter acronym that confusingly stands for 6 words. Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism.

Brown shower - The escort shitting on the client. This service is pretty hard to find in lil ol’ Aotearoa. 

Dress ups - a booking where the escort is dressed in a costume of your choice, but not also performing a fantasy scenario (see Role play). 

Fetish - A fetish booking will usually refer to the inclusion of foot, hair or armpit worship.

Full greek - Anal sex, with the escort receiving. No souvlaki.  

Full service - Full service is your ideal booking if you want to do some standard bouncing, as it refers to regular old intercourse, which includes penetrative sex, hand stuff and mutual oral at most places. Kissing and multi shots aren’t always included in full service, so you may be asked to pay extra.

Girlfriend experience - Similar to full service but expect it to be a bit intimate. The GFE normally includes french kissing and oral on her as well as chats, cuddles and relaxing in bed — the escort is there to embody a loving partner. 

Golden showers - Either being pissed on, or pissing on the escort. Generally they’ll provide a plastic mat or you’ll be asked to keep this in the shower, and they’ll request you drink lots of water beforehand. It’s a must to organise this in advance. Not something you can just decide to do willy-nilly. 

Hand relief - A handjob. 

Happy ending - Also a handjob. This is used more post-massage. 

Multi-shots -  The client gets to cum more than once if they can/want to. This can cost more than a standard booking. 

Pornstar experience - Basically the opposite of the girlfriend experience — this isn’t a night with your partner, this is a night with a whore. Also a full service, but with the addition of activities like dirty talk, strip tease, lap dance, toys, pearl necklace, so on and so forth. 

Role play - Sometimes in tandem with dress ups, role play is mutually performing a scenario. Think boss-employee / maid coming round to clean the house / pizza delivery guy.  

Roman shower - Being vomited on by the escort, often from a deep throat blow job. 

Sensual massage - an often naked massage, for both client and masseuse. Hand relief is often included and you can pay for extras like kissing, touching her, oral on her, receiving oral, prostate massage, but usually not full service. 

Spanish - also known as ‘titty fucking’, thrusting your dick, if you have one, between the escorts breasts. 

Strap on - While the other way round can be requested, this’ll most likely refer to the escort wearing a strap on to peg you. 

Tie and tease - Safe and gently tying up the client so you’re retained during some or all of the booking or vice versa. 

Watersports - Similar to a golden shower, but water sports includes playing with spit, cum, sweat and drool as well as piss. 

Rachel Barker is a writer / producer for VICE NZ in Aotearoa.