Illustration: Ashley Goodall
Karley Sciortino delves deep into sexuality on her SBS VICELAND show Slutever, which airs on Tuesdays at 9:30pm. Or you can always stream on SBS On-Demand.I kneel down onto my cold kitchen tiled floor, my partner staring knowingly in my direction. My legs are spread enough to allow for a pink perfectly frosted vegan cake to rest under me, and shaking in anticipation, I lower my bare nether regions into the cool squish of pink bliss.
This was what I liked: sex that didn’t pretend to be neat and tidy. There was nothing quiet or well behaved about what I desired, like the radical joy of sinking my genitals into a large pretty pink princess cake that looked good enough to eat — but that I’d rather sandwich against my body.I’m a cake sitter, and I’m not alone. The first time I heard of it I was a teenager and watching a late night TV show about “odd” fetishes. When I saw a beautiful woman in lingerie hovering her bottom above a white sheet cake, I felt tingles in places I was just starting to discover could give me pleasure.Cake sitting is a sexual fetish where, as you might have guessed, people sit on cakes for sexual pleasure. It's considered a subcategory of the "wet and messy" fetish (WAM), a form of sexual fetishism in which a person becomes aroused when copious amounts of a substance are applied to the naked skin, face, or clothing.Although numerous fetish porn web sites exist portraying cake sitters and other WAM fetishes, life stylers in the kink scene who have a sweet tooth for cake sitting generally meet in kink communities, dungeons, fetish parties, and explore their delicious kink either at play parties or in the privacy of their home.Part of the pleasure of cake sitting is physical, derived from the tactile sensation of the individual’s body meeting with something that is moist, messy and squishy. “Cake sitting and sploshing is all about the textures and sensations for me,” says Dylan Ryan, a 31 year old porn star and sexuality coach. “The squishing and the soft and wet and cool and sticky. I love feeling those things on my thighs and on my pussy.”
Another aspect of the pleasure can be psychological: the taboo of indulging in something that is kinky giving some individuals a sexual charge. Ryan says she loves how quickly sitting on a cake can go to smearing it onto her lover, followed by them rubbing it all over each other and licking it off. Her sweet tooth might also have some influence. “I’m a sugar person,” she says, “so cake is really just a perfect vehicle for both my sugar high and my fetishistic turn on.”Kimberly, a cake sitter and former professional cake decorator, says she has indulged in a lot of cake sitting in the past year. “I enjoy it because it feels amazing,” she says. “It smells amazing. It's not something you’re supposed to do; you're supposed to eat cake. It's messy and sticky and sweet - I love it.”Mona Darling, a former professional dominatrix, says she finds cake sitting — and smashing cake with her feet — to be appealing not because of the actions themselves, but because of “the intimacy of the situation.”“These are taboo topics that can inspire feelings of shame,” Darling explains, “so when someone finds a safe space to act on these fantasies, it creates a delicious intimacy where they can let go and indulge in their fantasies. That vulnerability and openness is what I find steaming hot.”Viola Parker, a 35-year-old professional dominatrix, says she’s not particularly into food play usually, but for some reason she has “really gotten off” on cake sitting. “I’d go into bakeries and see smooth and perfect cakes lined up in glass windows, all pretty and pastel. I would think: I wanna sit on that cake! Smash it. Destroy!”The first cake Parker sat on was for her birthday. “I had a submissive client who mentioned my birthday was coming up so we should do something special,” she recalls. “I said, ‘Bring me a cake.’ We set up a tarp, and I sat on my first cake. It was chocolate and so cool and smushy and I was laughing the whole time. Then I ‘made’ him lick it all off me … now every birthday that comes along there's a smooth, perfectly iced cake for me to smush.”One of the reasons she loves cake sitting is simple: “It’s fun. I like cake sitting because it’s playful and ridiculous, and I don't take anything too seriously. It also feels a little empowering to smush. And to see the little flattened cake and shape of your arse in its destruction.”Karley Sciortino delves deep into sexuality on her SBS VICELAND show Slutever, which airs on Tuesdays at 9:30pm. Or you can always stream on SBS On-Demand.