Saint Valentine: Patron Saint of cards, confectionary, and being packed into a restaurant with fifty other couples who feel socially obligated to celebrate their love with an early bird menu and a complementary basket of bread.
Which is why I suggest that, rather than sulk about the imposition of commercialised romance, we reclaim Valentine’s Day from saccharine teddy-bears and petrol station roses, and take it back to its roots. And, wherever you're from in the world, that involves a lot of whipping."The Romans celebrated by taking their clothes off, getting pissed, and spanking each other with a whip made from the skin of a sacrificed goat"
Ancient Rome
Artwork: 'Lupercalia' by Andrea Camassei
Lupercalia, the fertility festival celebrated by the Romans on February 14th, involved whipping women in the belief that it would help them get pregnant. Photo: Conrad Dressler, Lupercalia (1907), courtesy of the Walker Art Gallery, Liverpool
Czech Republic
The Eastern European tradition of whipping. Photo: via Alamy
Switzerland
Japan
Mexico
Indonesia
Such fertility rituals are found all over the world, so just what is going on? Clearly, you can’t flog yourself fertile, so why do so many cultures share this strange custom? Spanktastic sex, or ‘erotic flagellation’ to use the clinical term, is as old as sex itself. One of the earliest depictions of such kinky sex is found in the ‘Etruscan Tomb of the Whipping’ that dates to 490 BC and is named after the frescoes of BDSM that are painted on the walls.
‘Etruscan Tomb of the Whipping’ is the earliest depiction of kinky sex. Photo: Wikimedia Commons
Indiana Jones and his phallic whip. Photo: via Alamy