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April 16, 2009, 4:58pm

If you're curious for tips on how to become a grifter yourself, we checked it out and we've got our hands on a bona fide Myspace chat

Kari Ferrell

had with her first kiss of 2008. It's full of the sleazy not-even innuendo, red flag/harbingers of her inevitable funds-draining, and scary preggers talk that's lured in her marks and made her the




for two days. Oh, also, apparently

it wasn't just guys she went after

…That photo above? She sent it to a woman just a few weeks ago. PS: Jesus cracker, OK, we've been had: that image has been Photoshopped. The conversation, we assure you, is real, but this whole thing is so fucking out of control we honestly wouldn't be surprised if this turned out to be some project by the fucking Yes Men.

Date: May 22, 2008 4:16 PM


Hey, I kissed you on New Year's!….Bad news; I'm pregnant, and it's definitely yours. It came out looking like [another guy], but it has your nose. I hope you're planning on paying child support.


This isn't bad news at all, I've always wanted to be a dead beat dad. If you ever need me to take care of him for the weekend, I'll put him in my shopping cart and he can accompany me while I collect aluminum cans. Also, don't worry about child support, because any son of mine is gonna be a hard worker, so he can go ahead and pay for it himself. But what about the baby looking like [the other guy], but with my nose? Could this perhaps be a three-way-love-baby between you, [that guy], and I? If not, should we make one?


This works out perfectly, because my one dream and aspiration is to be an alcoholic mother. They just seem like they are having so much fun, all the time. Plus, I have always wanted to be so desperate for booze that I have to break into my kid's piggy bank for change. I think that just screams awesome parenting, right?….I think, perhaps, we should make this gang bang…err…threesome (whatever) a reality. I have many a hallway for your hot dogs.