You can look at draw ceremonies in one of two ways. The first is to see them as a dry, production-less exhibition of soccer's most prominent cardboard-flavored personalities, yielding information easily read on an Excel table. For those of you pleased with just that, there is a nicer-looking table above. You may go now.The official result of the #UCLdraw pic.twitter.com/Il4iQoqdLU
— Champions League (@ChampionsLeague) August 27, 2015
Zlatan's ego is feeling chill about PSG's chances with Real Madrid, Shakhtar Donetsk, and Malmö, but a Ronaldo-Ibrahimovic matchup offers some pretty heated competition. Easily the best thing we've seen since this.GROUP B@ChampionsLeague Kuradan sonra biz pic.twitter.com/dNKOzUajkk
— Zlatan Ibrahimović (@Ibra_oficiaI) August 27, 2015
If anyone should feel chill about their matchup, it's Basti. A piece of German chocolate cake (which he can grab when playing Wolfsburg in his home country, too).GROUP CGreat games coming up against Eindhoven, Moscow and Wolfsburg! #UCLdraw #mufc
— Basti Schweinsteiger (@BSchweinsteiger) August 27, 2015
Atletico are unbeaten in four fixtures against Galatasaray, winning two games - both away from home - and drawing the other two. #UCLdraw
— Champions League (@ChampionsLeague) August 27, 2015
There's probably a reason fools either ducked out or ran away early. Man City found themselves in the group of death here. Sevilla is nothing to shake a stick at. Oh, and Juventus? Yeah, you might remember them from being runners up last season.GROUP EMan City even had empty seats at the champions league draw pic.twitter.com/2iwLxVFi2e
— Agent_EdWoodward (@woodward_manutd) August 27, 2015
Well, yeah. The award ceremonies were a sideshow: everyone knew it would be Messi. As for the future of Barça in the Champions League, it's looking pretty bright. ESPN's Soccer Power Index puts them at a 90.1 percent chance of wining the group, and a 98.7 percent chance of advancing. But Bayer and Roma have been making a good showing lately, despite Roma's bonkers transfer window situation. So its a tossup between them for No. 2.GROUP FBarcelona fans right now pic.twitter.com/WFuXSkolGf
— Football Stuff (@FootbalIStuff) August 27, 2015
This is going to be priceless. Arsenal to face Bayern Munich is classic, classic Champions League. After eliminating Arsenal from two of the last three seasons, it's not a great look for the Gunners. Nevertheless, Olympiacos and Dinamo Zagreb shouldn't pose too much of a threat, so expect to see yet another Premier League team advance—that is, if Giroud continues to carry his team.Arsene Wenger, when he saw he will play against Bayern in UCL group stagepic.twitter.com/2GudUPLvnf
— Troll Football (@Troll__Football) August 27, 2015
It looks like another Premier League easy in. Despite a freezing trip to the Ukraine in the wintertime, Chelsea should have this on lock. Porto might give them some trouble, but the most interesting part about that matchup is Jose Mourinho vs. Iker Casillas. Awkward.GROUP HChelsea fans loving their group #UCLdraw pic.twitter.com/xnEWAROLaM
— Copa90 (@Copa90) August 27, 2015
Group H: "Group of Dearth" https://t.co/agWd7DCKMW
— Danny Page (@DannyPage) August 27, 2015
All in all, a total snoozer in Group H, but there's something to be said for an underdog. Particularly when a whole group is an underdog, which will necessitate a matchup with a bigger name in the knockout rounds. Imagine first-time Belgian champion Gent taking on Real Madrid. Might be fun.Champions League draw, crunched. pic.twitter.com/LoVMKcxBgO
— sportingintelligence (@sportingintel) August 27, 2015